I can't figure out where I went wrong

I’ve lived with roommates/ housemates most of my adult life. I have gotten along with almost all of them. And I’m getting along with people amazingly well at work. And I get along with people here. And my sisters know I get along with people, I lived with my sister for three years in my thirties and she invited me everywhere with her and her friends and I had a lot of good times and her friends were cool and treated me cool…

But now I am pretty much enemies with all my neighbors. I have got along with the new housemate for the most part, with just a few glitches that I think can be ironed out. But my neighbors are a different story. The “normie” neighbors opposite my bedroom window arbitrarily decided one night to invade my space and it’s been 7 months now. The other “normie” neighbors were just using me and I tried to fight back and they pulled out all the stops and did stuff I can’t forgive. Likewise with the older ladies that I share a wall with.

The new guy upstairs moved in and apart from being loud and boisterous I thought we would get along and in fact we did for awhile. Now, there’s some kind of friction when I realized after three or four days that he misunderstood this place and he pretty much started listening and being aware of my every move. Now he and the older ladies pretty much have made it their mission to pretty much destroy me and they think they are in the right and whatever they do is OK. They think they know what’s good for me and they have it stuck in their mind how I should act and they think they have me figured out and any action outside of what they think of me i.e. any sign of life or spirit from me AT ALL needs to be stamped out. WTF?

I could be so happy right now doing my thing if they let me alone. In some ways I am happier and more full of life than almost any other time in my recovery. But the bitter, crazy old lady and the 300 lb idiot are making me miserable. I have confronted neighbors about leaving me alone several times, both men and women. They misunderstood and thought I was threatening them (I wasn’t) . Now management warns me not to confront them in any way. What am I supposed to do?

Everybody here is sensitive to noise, they’re tuned in to me is the only way I can describe what they are doing to me and are hyper aware of what I’m doing in my own apartment and have several ways of crushing my spirit automatically. This whole building is in some kind of weird mind game time warp or something and mind games and craziness abounds. Intimidation abounds and weird sh*t. It can’t be described. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe nothing is going on.

Honestly, you sound a little paranoid to me.

But I’m not in your shoes so I really can’t tell which way is up or down.

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Shoes are the least of my problems. I’ll cop to being paranoid.

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I lived in a 3 story apartment for years. Noise and neighbours were always a going concern.

I would hope your other tenants have more going on in their lives than picking on you. But like I said, I’m not with you so I can’t give you a lot of advice at the moment.

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I use the rule of threes when I am trying to decide if the problem in a conflict is me or someone else. If I am fighting with one person, they are probably being a jerk. If I then have an issue with another person, then I am unlucky enough to run into two jerks. If I have three separate conflicts with three different people, then it is time to acknowledge that I am the one being irritable/paranoid/delusional.

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My law of dancing and neighbors states it takes two to tango. The counselor used that line on me. I am not aggressive, in my book I didn’t start this crap and any normal person would react in some way to being treated unfairly.

The problem is though, if nothing is going on and you confront the other tenants they’ll think you are a weirdo and perhaps complain to the Landlord about you.

This happened to me once. I confronted my neighbours and nothing was going on so they filed a complaint against me. It was all in my delusional head.

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