I personally receive very little support from other family members.
It’s very clear to me that my brother is not capable of offering much support.
I’m going to have to rely on paid caregivers in my future, like my mental health team.
Is your family supportive?
I wouldn’t say that my family is supportive, in the sense that they try to help me out. I’m grateful that they still speak to me after my psychotic breach., but I try not to rely on them for anyting
not enough.
But boy are they there on birthdays and holidays.
Probably another reason why I became a drinker.
My parents are - the rest I never really hear from.
This pretty much sums it up for me
Not sure how long I will live for though, as I am a pretty heavy smoker
My folks shop, cook, and I guess give, me meals.
I’m more metaphysical though.
My Dad once compared Sz pill taking to his blood pressure pill he takes.
Also so pick my head, one evolved on my hairline visibly. It became a problem then… I tried to say he’s part of that. He said ‘I didn’t force you to pick your head’.
And so it goes…
Yes mine is. My parents helped me through my initial diagnosis. At first the didn’t understand and were very hard on me because I was struggling in college. Now I have an understanding hubby who is stable and supportive. I have many friends who might not understand what I’m going through but they are there for me. I also have this site. I’m lucky though. I have such a good support system, which has helped me be stable and successful more than the average person with a serious mental illness. I’m most aware that very few people have this and I sympathize.
you mean monetarily?
yeah, my parents just bought a new, really nice home.
My daughter’s husband is camp director, and they get free house.
and I’m in constant jeopardy of losing My home.
I feel like I never got lucky.
My dad is supportive but he’s kind of fading away now.
I’m turning into his caregiver.
I guess I’m going to have to rely on myself more.
For transportation I’ll rely on my caseworker in the future.
I’m too paranoid to take Uber by myself.
My caseworker is a sweetheart.
Such a good person.
@Daze I know what you mean. When my life was spinning out of control, I turned to my father to see if he could lend me some money just so that I could continue to fight the insurance company. He said no.
Then I asked two of my sisters to help, one bought a timeshare in a ski lodge instead, the other was investing in property and didn’t want to help.
If the tables were turned, I know I would have helped them. It was a tough one to let go, but I’ve worked on it. Forgiveness is for my sake, not theirs
I have a “fair weather” family. When things are going well they’re around. When things aren’t going well they’re not around or indeed make things worse.
“The more help you need, the less you get and the less help you need, the more you get” is a motto I now live by.
This is my brother unfortunately
Yes we are going to install security cameras to help me feel more safe.
Shoot that is hard to learn about with regard to your family members.
I am learning things about my sister I think, but don’t know for certain.
The baby of my bro and SIL came over. On group photo stream she chimes: Hope [he] had so much fun at grandma and grandpas house. I’ve lived in said house for a long fime… but it felt like she omitted me solely bc I’m not on the deed?
It sounds like stinkin thinkin but it taxed me.
yeah, money is everywhere, it’s ridiculous when you’re down and out, and can’t come up with enough.
I’ve given thru Pay Pal, but never received, never asked anyone for money.
It’s touchy cuz I worry my mom will come back at me like I owe her, and all the good things she does for me. I gave my brother 300 dollars once when he was out of work,
and he swore he’d pay me back. he never did.
I even let him stay in my house for 3 months for free.
But when I was drinking, I always made him pay. ha.
I don’t associate with my family on my mother’s side nor my inlaws. Long stories for both, but not worth repeating.
I do have a wonderful, supportive husband and friends.
There’s a lot here that I have and some clarification I feel like adding… I think.
We coddle my sis mentally… bc she lives so far. I think my BIL may be greedy about leaving anything on the table. Up to and including things like respect.
I can’t shake it or how bad the advent of him in my journey/story has been.
Worse I’m sulking in real theories that he is like dominating my sis by proxy? By being a tough cookie for me?
There’s a ton here but I’ll leave you with this:
‘Enough. I can’t. Make it stop’. Phrases like that rattle in me.
Maybe you don’t understand but like one time he said : Social isn’t enough; you have to pay for things like cable, tv, Internet, phone, ad nauseum. We were alone. I think he’s way smarter than me and wanted a new piece of info he wanted me to come back with the sum I get? I can’t I don’t like him. I wish it were not like this…
I think Raskolnikov in Crime and Punishment had a dark spot with his BIL.
(It’s just the greatest reading achievement of my life. I needed Ritalin that coincidentally I was on. Just a split second of my life.)
I have no biz reading that book - and it didn’t serve me.
All I have now from it is how the Inn housed the said protagonist, and fed him tea and toast as a freebie.
With my motor mouth and newer lease on life I almost want a store on main called ‘tea and toast’ whereby I can deliver that and just talk to people who may need it. I need it.
As I write this I see what I must really do though…
Give my therapist a call. I’ve been slow to execute on that bc tele health therapy is far from ideal.
I get pretty good support from family. They have their lives though, but seem to tolerate my problems well. I also try not to bother them too much because I’m usually in a manic mode.
It sounds like your brother has his own set of problems and neither of you understand the other ones set of issues. I’d give him space and work in becoming more independent @Wave
I also will have to rely on paid caregivers once my parents are gone. It’s certainly not the worst scenerio. I remember someone from this forum who was from Nepal who said ‘if family couldn’t care for you, then good luck.’ They have no disability or social service programs in the country I guess.
Besides being a narcissist or worse yet a sociopath my brother has a lot of issues.
He’s not capable of empathy so he’s not capable of displaying emotional support.
He might set things up for me helping manage my finances or help setting me up with certain services but that’s about it.
The entire world and universe revolves around him.
Yes @anon99082702 im just going to have to work on being more independent but it’s difficult when you are afraid of everything.
Thanks.