How I really am these days

I’ve been struggling with this illness for 30 years now. It’s been wrought with pain and insanity, lots of jails, hospitals, rehabs and mental institutions. I’ve been successful in Real Estate as an Investor and been a good saver. I’ve decided that drugs and drink had to go. I also never found a medication that ever helped me. Every med I’ve tried had horrible symptoms, in fact I now have diabetes cause I’ve been such a trooper when it came to giving the med’s a try, like many, including Doctors and Family have suggested but in the long run I’ve got to live with myself.
So, my life isn’t at all how I’d hoped it would be and yet it’s not too bad at all at the age of 47. I workout at the local gym often, I ride my motorcycle often, I attend 12 step recovery meetings (although I feel it’s a cult and everyone just repeats the same stuff) - I find that it’s a place to feel like I am interacting with people at a somewhat normal healthy level. I play a lot of video games, watch movies on TV - Netflix. I am in a relationship for almost two years. It’s of late been real hard but we work at it. I know life is better with her than without her. All I can say is that it gets better for some of us in time. I still don’t have the eating healthy thing down to a science, but I keep trying. I’ve also been married and helped raise three kids to adulthood. I hate that this illness has such a stigma to it cause I have to lie so often or else I get stigmatized and I wish there was something I could do to alleviate this stigma about us. Any how life sure isn’t always easy but there are certainly times that I truly enjoy.

Santa Clause aka Django81


You just gave me some hope for my son–who is 37. I hope he will be able to do as well as you are doing. I hope he will just feel good again and be at peace with everything–thank you


Every time they talk about hope in a prison movie it seems bad but not so here- Hope we find our way!

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