i was brought up on the poverty line, i had no money to get drugs, i smoked which left me penniless my clothes were all cheap and i hardly cleaned or went out,
i met someone and things changed, i was going out and doing things with that person, it wasnt that i didnt want to go out before its just that i didnt feel safe going out on my own, i went out about 3 times a week to a shop with our pet dog and thats all i could manage.
now i live on my own i have nice clothes, i go to college, i go out every day sometimes myself, i dont smoke anymore, housework is done most of the time (although my friend helps occasionally) i just opened my doors to my house and rent out my room as a guest house and i am thinking of renting out bikes and dog boarding, i also want a part time job which i intend to share with my friend (who also has mental issues) i am on holiday writing this right now in the Canaries just off of Africa, hoping to get my diving licence and going on a boat today, i go to church.
things are just so much better now thanks to meds and the right enviroment, i’m hoping one day that i can go on tv and people can think that things can get better for us and it is not all doom and gloom all of the time.
i was preparing for the military for like 2 years. doing sport everyday, eating right was feeling incredibly great with a weight loss of 30kg or more in total. i was rejected 2 years earlier due to overweight but now i was confident they would take me because i fullfilled all the criteria. but all of a sudden when i was preparing to move on and do the next step the day after i went out of the blue full insane believing in angels and whatnot feeling like ■■■■. and then in the hospital i lost basically everything i trained for and the dream of joining the military was destroyed. i regained all the weight due to meds and now am back where i started.
the pains were horrific 35 years ago and now i am just uncomfortable. i couldn’t think straight and now i can even manage a job and contribute at home. i am very proud of my accomplishments but i see i gotta get it going emotionally for myself and those around me.
From unspeakable (and unlivable > suicidal) hell from 1994 to 2003 to being able help others in the same place I was in – who are willing to go to any lengths – to get out.
congratulations to everyone here on this site that strives to better themselves through recovery, meds, therapy etc, it all adds up, EVERy last bit, even when you dont think it is helping, it is.