Its like i go in to episodes of depression then sadness and tears.
I feel like a narcissist for focusing on my looks all the time but i have seen and experienced people being nasty to both me and my mom when we went out and how they treated someone who was unattractive.
I always try to treat people with respect regardless of how they look but i remember my mum going to this festival and there was these dances on and you had to pick someone to dance with no body picked my mum as she was deemed unattractive.
It really messed my self esteem up as i both felt sorry for her and was frightened of having that done to me as i look like my mum. I feel so bad afterwards and regret alot of what i say but i just cant help it sometimes. People are so cruel.
I also have trauma from school for being picked on for how i smell and for how i looked back then.
I guess so. When i was at school it was all that people where interested in. Got to me a bit. I never had self esteem problems before high school infact tbh i was in a dream world mostly thinking about cats and dogs and didnt think about looks. I want to go back to those times.
Yet again, those adults aren’t representing the full human spectrum. Maybe you’ll connect with other people that love animals for example. Keep looking.