So what do you think?
My madness turns into anger when it gets extreme.
2 Likes
That makes sense.
2 Likes
I know when I’m most crazy. Hehe. 
Aside from that there’s my delusional stories which I also don’t discuss really.
1 Like
i still have residual delusions from first episode schizoohrenia. now if the paranoia increases i feel empty mind and drowsy and fear sensation in my mind and intense delusionas starts to hit me.
1 Like
well i’m hearing my father talk to me.
i have delusions too. they were fun until all the graphic stuff came to the surface and became scum. i’m alone. i’m afraid. i let too many years go by and now i’m old.
1 Like
Same.
I think the 300 pound, pure muscle, 6’ 2" orderly at the mental hospital isn’t even a match for me and I go after other patients because I think they’re doing sh!t and I don’t like how noisy they are.
I think armed police officers are fair game just because they give me directions I don’t like.
Even though I’ve only been in one fight I call out other ladies to fight who are much tougher than me and act all enraged and crazy and ■■■■showing up with swords and big sticks.
And it’s a total personality change because I am a completely passive and peaceful person normally and believe you discuss things to resolve conflict.
2 Likes
One time I thought people were telling me to commit suicide. I got pretty crazy then. It seems like when I reach an impasse people start escalating, and I get really mad. I don’t usually do anything, other than sulking. That’s not a crime.
1 Like
Hmm, well before I learned enough to be able to just leave the house when the dark forces attacked, I would hide in the bathroom with a knife. I think thats some crazy potential right there.
1 Like
10/10
Still do not recommend.
2 Likes
I know how crazy I can get. My current challenge is to see how well I can get.
4 Likes
I was angry at my psychiatrist in the hospital ward. My voices kept telling he is being so aggressive with me because he thinks his penis is big. He was telling me “when are we going to get you on some real meds” I said to him “Do you have a big penis?” He looked like a pornstar type dude with his hair in a ponytail.
Turns out he was one of the most compassionate people to me in my life. He had a wife and a picture of his daughter in his office. He took good care of me until he left the state
2 Likes
That happened to me too. I used to get really angry before I was on meds and when I’d quit taking my meds so meds it is for me.
1 Like
I would say pretty darn crazy based on past incidents. I’m not sure how to measure it so I will just use the ghostbusters analogy.
If the normal amount of crazy were an average sized twinkie. My twinkie wouldve been about the size of full sized suv and weighed about 3000 pounds.
That’s a lot of cream filling! Yum!
4 Likes
Well,
I ended up going to a different country in mania. I thought I would be well and complete my graduate degree in Statistics. And, then, possibly start working. I was in mania and not being stable on a medication combination, it was quite far-fetched. However, I did end up joining a graduate program and studied for maybe 15 days in the program, but didn’t go further because of anxiety and not being set on medications.
2 Likes
Well I moved to 7 different states in 8 months running from my myself during the first psychosis ended up back home ripping the mini blinds in every room peeping out to see who was after me.
Turns out you can’t out run yourself.
3 Likes
The craziest i get is when i have a paranoia attack. But then i just end up in bed for 12 hours chewing lots of tobacco and smoking cigarettes
2 Likes
My insanity presents itself in so many different forms that I’ve forgotten half of them and the other half are too extensive to list but I’ll offer a sample:
For instance I can get suicidal, scream at 3 a.m., nonstop, at the top of my lungs, in an apartment complex, until the police arrive to cart me to the mental hospital.
I’ve done my student nurse rounds while being in the throes of a delusion that I was Ms. Florence Nightingale herself.
I’ve had vivid visual hallucinations of penises, vaginas, rectums, and breasts all appearing on a hospital dividing curtain around my bed. Why? Idk.
I could go on…
2 Likes
At my worst i was diagnosed with disorganized schizophrenia. I wasnt eating (thought i was poisoned), couldnt figure out how to dial a phone, and once thought window cleaner was food and ate it. I just paced all day and literally bounced off walls for months.
2 Likes
Me too. 15151515
Me too. 1515151515