I am lost in thoughts right now. I want to be the guy who I was when I was 17. But I am a completely different person now.
Problem is I don’t know if that is due to the illness or due to the meds.
Itriedtoexplain myself to my nurse but my thoughts were all over the place. I must have had a moment of clarity because I had the sense to say I don’t know what I want so I will defer decisions of my care to the community mental health team.
So I got my depot just now. I have taken my night meds an hour early and hope to sleep till midnight. I want to goon the night shift for a while. The daytime affairs of men are just stressing me out right now.