Woke up at 4 this morning feeling like utter crap. My anxiety is going thru the roof and im getting paranoid about going outside. The flats like a bomb site with ciggie ash that seems to be everywhere and im feeling really piss ed off. I cant motivate myself to do anything at the moment apart from sitting here stressing out. I doubt they would give it to me but i really could do with some diazapam to calm down with.
Gonna ring the nurse at 9am. Im scared im gonna pick up a can or worse take a razor to my arm for the relief. What the hell is wrong with me? I missed my quetiapine dose last night - cos i run out, they are due today, but im not even sure i can make it to the chemist. I HATE THIS ANXIETY
I keep hearing conversations off the fans on the computer - it hasnt helped i havent seen no one for days. Someone tell me im gonna be ok?
Ive calmed down a bit - since leaving a voicemail for the nurse to ring. Gonna ask for a visit - if nothing to pick up my script for me. Too paranoid to go out at the moment. Ive put some music on to try and keep my mind busy. I wont SH. Im stronger than that.
Any way,it’s good to have someone in the house,mine is empty because I don’t fit here for adoption from shelter.And my family is strongly against me keeping pets.
Percys a great comfort to me. My only concern was that i needed an indoor cat and whether i could afford the vets bills. I had permission from the council. You should adopt one if you can - i quite often talk to him when no-ones around!
Got text from Nurse - gonna come round in an hour. Thank God.
