i have never ever ever sexually assaulted anyone ever and i dont intend to
i did get in a few fights when younger though, its not a good place to go
I also self harmed a lot, quite badly in psychosis, although I only do it these days when Iām psychotic
My sister self injures a lot more seriously, she stabs herself and cuts severely
It was not intentional for me, any of it, it was all under psychosis.
Iāve not been violent or seriously abusive without a command or a certain belief that it was requested
except for one scrap with a girl out of mutual anger age 13. That is my one time intentional and out of anger scrap and she was a lot worse than me
It is actually good to hear that there isnāt much unintended violence here
Iāve only been attacked once myself, that was in hospital and she was clearly unwell because it was really sudden and unprovoked
iāve been beaten up a few times, once it was a crowd of at least 20 people and i managed to escape then i went back and someone tried to bottle me, people are stupid.
Jesus!
In a way you were lucky
Could have been a lot worse
well i ran home crying that night anyway bc some people i thought were friends turned against me and idk why, the guy i was fighting was older than me but about the same size, someone stole my cigs out of my pocket (a so called friend) thats why i went back next thing you know someones put a bottle in his hand and somehow iām scrapping again, he dropped the bottle though, i got fed up fighting and thats when the rest joined in, it was so dark that i crawled out from the frackas unscathed somehow unseen haha ran home.
Haha x
Sorry about your friends
But turned out okay in the sense of not being seriously injured
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there is an even worse story than, i dont talk about it though
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maybe my friends secretly helped me escape haha
think iām going to go with that now lol, apart from the one who stole my cigs though,
i ended up fighting him when he was older, he was much larger and older than me, i gave him a black eye but thats bc i had been drinking, he threw the first punch though, when i was sober he kicked my ass bc i didnt want to fight him anymore i just went down into a ball and protected my head, jacket was padded though so not so bad, didnt even bruise much lol.
thats why drink is so dangerous, it can make you do things you wouldnt normally do.
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Yeah, it is, I feel very vulnerable when I drink and Iām in a place I donāt know or on the way home through the City on my own
I definitely agree, but am generally safe as I normally have 2 drinks only
yeah you need to be careful when you are drinking,
i havent ever taken advantage of anyone who has been drunk, i wouldnt,
iām not that stupid, but i have heard stories about it,
people regretting what they did and things
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Must be terrifying having to lie there and get kicked, padded jacket or no
it was a bit but i knew he would stop eventually bc it would make him look bad just kicking me while i was down, if he had told me to stand up then that would have been a problem lol
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Once i got really mad and threw all the glasses from a table. Didnāt hurt anyone but they all got really upset. I had a girl fight in school and that fat bitch had beaten ā ā ā ā out of me.
Perhaps itās just time to let go and start anew. ALSO, have you ever been baptized? That may help overall maybe, seeking Godās help and not the hallucinationsā¦but seeking the wisdom and knowledge of somebody great to survive the horrors of today.
If you knew of the terrors of just my childhood, youād really run for your life. Iāll never log anything online about the assaults I suffered, or whatever I may have done to hurt others. This great electronic plase isnāt that type of paradiseā¦
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I take 1200 mgs gabapentin a day, it can help but reallyā¦beer helped the most.
I REALLY admire the way you work and continue during the travesties of mental illness.
Erratica, you are really a leader of forums!
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Iāve been baptised but Iām not Christian Right now, closer to Hindi really but I donāt practice muchā¦ I do yoga and meditation retreats, occasionally,
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Krishna huh? Well it all really begins with the inner workings.