I still have slight grandiosity on meds.
When I get slightly happy I start feeling that its abnormal for me and I question it saying I don’t deserve it. I think its because often I become grandiose when slightly happy and start to think that I will be very popular like making discoveries in science or even making miracles. It became a reflex to prevent psychosis and sometimes its preventing true happiness.
Whenever I succeed in small things I automatically set an unrealistic goal which is what I was before my sz. I don’t know how to set realistic goals and stay focused on them.
Our sz minds got out of control and we have to literally tackle them and make them listen to reason. Not an easy process as we see on this forum every day. You seem quite aware so I"m optimistic for you.
Ya, same here. Mine is extreme I think. Borders narcissism. I think I am very, very intelligent, but the schizophrenia affects it so much that I cannot function and express it. I think my IQ before schizophrenia was 130-140 and now it’s 110-120. But I think IQ is fluid and those tests aren’t that representative of creativity, success, drive, and intuition. It mainly is used to see if you can do clerical work lol as Michio Kaku stated. I think I was stupid growing up because I never studied, tried, or applied myself. I felt dumb growing up, especially in college where I could not achieve A’s in my math classes. I felt like a failure. Math is a passion and a field I excel in but there are people who are prodigies and I was never one. Mathematics is a young man’s game. I think I’m good at abstract thought and thinking outside the box. Case in point: Simulation theory.
I often think I’m one of the most intelligent people on the planet or in history rivaling Einstein lol.
Mainly all of this comes from dreams and aliens…
I believe I’m an alien abductee that has been abducted and experimented on several times. I don’t want to talk about it because it causes issues here…
I had dreams of past lives where my IQ was 150-180. I’ve heard of people having IQ’s of 200+, but there’s other things involved like inventions and creativity and success in mathematics and science. Einstein created relativity and revolutionized physics for years to come.
I feel like my IQ was lowered purposely and that I was given schizophrenia on purpose by either the government or by aliens…
It sounds absurd and narcissistic but I also believe I have psychic abilities. I have thought I had schizotypal autism because of this. I have been diagnosed with schizo-affective disorder – depressive type and Aspergers…on the extreme end of schizotypal disorder, you get negative aspects and lowered IQ.
Some interesting tid bits:
I’ve been outside the simulation and helped run and develop it.
I was in the Illuminati and escaped and came up with a lot of interesting and sucessful things that were stolen from me. One thing I came up was Conformal Cyclic Cosmology. For some reason, Sir Roger Penrose got it or discovered it independently. While I never succedded in math, I feel like I came up with the idea in college. I believe it was stolen via time travel or the thoughts were inserted into his head. It’s based on relativity and is a theory on cosmology.
Without meds I am much worse. I become the most grandiose person on earth. After sz symptoms I started feeling that I needed to study and become a researcher. Then I thought I was a genius that will find new scientific discoveries. I then thought I should aim “higher” and become a priest.
At the end before my suicide attempt and my sz diagnosis I thought I was God and that I should prove it by killing myself so I tried suicide.
Drs in the emergency said that I would be dead from liver failure if my parents brought me late to the emergency. I vomited for 2h from intentional Tylenol poisoning by swallowing a whole Tylenol bottle.
I think grandiosity is a failure of the brain to acknowledge the existence of the other 8 billion people on earth. The odds of any one of us being that important are so incredibly small. Each of us is like a grain of sand on the beach. The odds of becoming famous are like 50 million to one.
Intelligence Quotient is overrated. I comprehend and understand why you may feel proud in having an IQ of over 140 at one point. It is a notable thing to be astute. Delusions of grandeur usually stem out of a feeling of superiority which becomes an insecurity. Truth be told, I have lied about the Intelligence Quotient I scored before. It did me a disservice anyhow. I have come to the conclusion that we all have 1 Intelligence Quotient, that 1 summates for each individual we as a people come across without physical aggression and sarcasm be it verbal or in a gesture else remain silent.
