Schizophrenia.com

Fkn sz made me dumber

He wanted me to get high grades in kinesiology and then transfer to medschool like he did but his program was biology, he got perfect grades 4 GPA and got in medschool. Now he’s a cardiologist but doesnt talk to me since I insulted him when I was psychotic. He told me to get back on my meds, I insulted him and said he’s the crazy one that needs crazy pills.

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Pretty typical. I disrespected my Uncle back then and he stopped talking to me. He has depression and holds grudges. It happens.

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SZ initially made me dumber when I had worse symptoms and was on higher doses of meds. Working my way down to lower doses and pushing myself to regain lost function has me at close to where I was before SZ. Now when I take classes with co-workers I’m always the one with the top mark. I couldn’t so much as read a business card when I was first DXed, let alone function as an employee of a biz.

Improvement is possible.

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I cant lower my doses now, I get positive symptoms and irritability if I do. More irritability than positive symptoms though.

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I think you’re the most inspirational person on these forums.

I had very little intellectual stimulation between my first hospitalisation in 1975 and getting online in 1996. My wife wasn’t book smart. If street smarts were a boxing match though she’d have knocked me out in the 1st or 2nd round.

It might not seem like it at present , but participating on these forums makes you smarter than the average person with sz. You have the potential to do well in life.You’re not hopeless cases.

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I’m dealing with some positive symptoms as it’s been a rough summer with physical health issues and my wife’s parents. Stress = increased positive symptoms. As for being irritable, that’s 24/7 with me.

Currently working through the above in the hopes of being less pissy.

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Every day that passes I die a little bit. I thought I was finished dying more than 20 years ago but no. I like to read and it made me smart. I started reading after I got ill and it was almost impossible. But I only truly loved about five authors out of hundreds I read. I’m intellectual and I figured out everything in life with the basics of religion and philosophy, but I don’t remember what it was because I’m so burned out. Basically, I came to the conclusion that all knowledge goes around to its starting point and has no real reason to it, the universe is just made up nonsense, but I can’t prove it the exact thoughts are lost to my darkened vision.

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