Feeling I won't always have control 🎛️

I know Im Supposed to say that it’s just my sz but I’m really being bullied. I’m not posting to talk about that tho.

Im Afraid one day I won’t have self control and I don’t know what I might do. I try everything to forgive and be a better person but I think these people are just being cruel bullies and not really trying to make anything better.

I am not a believer in complete free will and I know one day I will loose it and ruin everything. I feel like the only thing I can do is give it everything I have until my self control fails.

In other words …I’m ■■■■■■.

@ThePoet @broken @dreamer54 @labratmat @ThreeRivers @Lostboy @TheCanuk @Zwaynopolous

Guys I’m really in a predicament…

[ edited for language by moderator - v ]

4 Likes

honestly you need to work with a psychiatrist to get your meds right, abstain from cannabis and alcohol, and work on your persecution delusions by realizing nobody is bullying you

5 Likes

Try to avoid bullies if possible. You don’t want to snap and end up going to prison. You can watch prison YouTube videos and see how bad it is around the US. It’s what stopped me from doing some things that would’ve got me arrested and sent to prison.

4 Likes





2 Likes
2 Likes

You might have too much going on. When I have to much going on my mind goes in shambles, environment might be a trigger too, if you’re doing nothing and your mind is still your enemy you need to talk to a doctor. You might just need to talk it out everyday too till you get better coping mechanisms. You might need to follow a life coach for mentally ill people if you can find one online, that could help.

3 Likes

I read a lot of the article and I’m definitely emotionally unstable. I just don’t know if it’s because I’m being mobbed or mental illness. I have mood swings without triggers but the rage/anger only happens when I feel abused.

Even tho it’s unlikely…it’s still possible to be persecuted/mobbed because people think your a bad person…

Idk man… I’m gonna ask my p-doc to shunt my emotions with meds…better to be a zombie than In prison I guess

2 Likes

Thanks man… I might look into a life coach …or at least talk to my therapist and see what she says.

Under normal conditions I’m harmless…but the rage I feel could definitely lead to bad consequences… I’m gonna keep trying…again i appreciate your advice bro…

I still have delusions and paranoia, I just notice when I’m triggered and divert my attention to something else. The more power you give these thoughts the stronger they become. The more you think about them the more they wire synapses in your brain and this becomes your default setting when thinking. Better to get away from what triggers you and distract yourself with something and don’t think about it.

1 Like

@AKendrick Saw your tag in an email and wanted to share this with you brother. Always remember this quote, and talk to your Dr. about a more appropriate AP

1 Like

I am sorry that you are suffering at the moment, but know it shall pass.

If you write a journal of how you are feeling and why, you can in time come to learn things about yourself.

The jounal is for you, to read back to yourself. Make a list of all paranoias and why you feel this way. List who is and how people are bullying you, exactly. Question yourself as to the possibility that your point of view may be skewed or quantify why you are correct.

Write daily and learn about yourself and how you feel on a day to day basis. Read it back at the end of the week and see how you feel about it then.

Make concerete plans as what you should do and not do about these things. Just write them out and consider them. Do not act on them, but understand how you feel.

In time you can reflect and see your cycles. When you are depressed and how it affects you, how impulsive you are, what your cues and triggers are and learn to deal with them apporpriately.

This journal is for you.

There is nothing better than knowing yourself!

Hang in there mate, keep calm, do breathing exercises, make music, do things that take you out of your head and look outward and positively towards others.

:slight_smile:

1 Like

I will give it a try too. I’m desperate at this point …I feel myself slipping pretty bad right now

1 Like

Kendric I Think I Can push you in the right direction just like your other friends. You know I dropped the bottle 21 years ago and have only used alcohol on rare occasions since then. Don’t get drunk or drugged cause those Can make you loose the grib on your life.
If you have substance disorder then try.
Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous.
Its crushiol you get Clean. If you dont get off of Them they will destroy you.
If you still have anger problems like I had until resently it maybe that your doctor has mixed a cocktail of meds that dont work Well togethers or aint calming enoght. We really get into troubles when we show signs of aggressions in public. And always remember to take your meds. Only few of us with these conditions Can go without meds.

1 Like