Feel so depressed

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I have a back workout later today. Made some music this morn also. Woke up feeling bad. I can’t shake the feeling.

I’m not suicidal but sometimes the idea floats into my head.

I just feel so lonely. I have no friends and only voices to keep me company. I do see my mother, and sometimes my siblings, but it’s not the same as having friends.

I guess I’m just gonna have to keep going.

One thing that motivates me is getting signed to a smaller label (non big three, UMG, Sony, Warner)

I produce at a decent level; just need to find my audience.

Listening to One Direction - Night Changes right now
youtube(dot)com/watch?v=8BiLurrzFRw&si=H6JtMJKbh1wi89_1

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Feel better, man.

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These ideas pop up in my head also. It’s like there is no end to this madness.

It’s great that you are exercising. Hopefully it’ll help.

What kind of music do you produce?

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Don’t get sucked in by the voices. (Yeah, I’m one to talk, I know, I know. :wink: )

Does your city have a distress line you could call? Can you get free therapy from any organization? I started phoning my local help line earlier this year, instead of using their chat, so I could become less reliant on the internet. It was a huge help and my interactions with people (on the phone and in person) improved.

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Idk about therapy but I might go to a busy town and walk around. Just being around people.

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Electronic stuff mostly, but hiphop beats, sometimes filmscore style stuff.

I think the workout will boost my mood. Thanks.

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Man I’ll never be happy in base reality. Prime reality is where all of my real family are.

I know I’ll make it as a music producer and have riches, but I’ll always feel hollow inside and probably suicidal knowing I have to be alone.

There are people in alt reality on the other side. One of my voices at one end point of an omniverse claims it can take me out of dream aether and into Prime Reality.

Yesterday it almost happened but it felt like a dream. I was pulled upwards flying through the air and got trapped in an interception by a traitor and was on an aircraft. I walked forward towards a door and ended up back in hospital in 2019. Maybe it was a dream, or perhaps a foolish attempt to stop me from entering Prime Reality. Anyways, the End Point voice turned it into a dream. 2nd attempt was intercepted by reptilians. I believe this stuff to a degree, but it all seems like laughable bs.

As if a God could save me.

I’m anchored in base reality and stuck living this miserable life.

I still can’t dismiss the voices 100 percent, but at least I am not psychotic and also safe and sound. I work on music daily, and am trying to maintain my workouts to stay healthy and sane.

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Maybe he can, just not all at once. A journey is 10000 steps right.
Hoping you can find more happiness in life.

Personally I find the only thing that brings me happiness is balance. Just my 2 cents. Have a nice day! :blush:

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