Driving Paranoid

DX'd - Sz/SzA
1

Lately the last 3 weeks I’ve become very paranoid again with driving. I dread it. It’s sucks. I’m a very safe driver and I’m very cautious but still I’m worried. Sometimes I feel like I can’t get out of my house at all. I’m thinking about trying Sarcosine but I can’t seem to find a buyer anymore that sells it in powdered form. Maybe someone can PM me a link? :thinking: Anyways I live in the Alabama countryside now so not that many cars until I get to the downtown area of Columbus GA. I just dread it.

I’ve improved on every level, depression, voices, mood, expression, responsibility, etc you name it. It feel like I don’t have schizo anymore except for this stupid paranoia with driving :disappointed_relieved: I don’t know what to do. I can go to my VA doctor anytime with walk ins but I gotta drive 25 minutes there. I didn’t go to my dental appointment yesterday either that’s an hour away.

Now I wish I had gone but I wish it could of been closer which it can. There is a VA hospital at the army base here. I’ll figure that out later. Today is the independence of my little micro nation 6 years now. We’re having a wood burning festival, fireworks, and a surprise for everyone.

It’s just this paranoia of driving. I have to go to the fireworks dealer 8 mins away in the countryside for the fireworks that I still haven’t bought yet tomorrow. Sometimes I don’t know what to do with this BS. It sucks. I just need a hug from my wife right now and my two boys.

I’m still here and I won’t leave this beautiful planet. I want a moment to be real with everyone to feel like I belong, I’m not afraid, I want to tell you who I am, I know who I am, I want a moment to be real and hold on, how can the world want me to change when they stay the same? No one can tell me who to be, I just got to be me.

With everything I’ve gone through, all these wispers and lies I’m still here, I want to feel things I don’t feel, I want to be purely normal, and I’m almost there but not yet. But some day I will.

I just need help :disappointed_relieved::persevere::sob:

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The paranoia of driving gets to alot of people on this forum so don’t feel alone. It sounds like you are doing pretty good aside from what you experience while driving. Luckily this forum is pretty good for support :slight_smile: I too feel uncomfortable at times when I drive, unfortunately it is often a necessity if you are able to operate a vehicle. Maybe you could minimize your driving and otherwise take a mini break. And when you return to the wheel condition yourself to know you are most likely safe driving if you practice safe techniques

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i usually get paranoia when i get a new car and i see the police, it lasted a few days before so not too bad, have you tried playing some soothing music in your car while driving,

my biggest problem driving is tiredness :frowning: i don’t like that

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I do my best to minimize driving a much as possible. But still I get all worried. I know I’ll overcome this as I have overcome everything else in the last 2 years. I just wish it was over ya know. :slightly_smiling_face:

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