I have been suspended from work with pay. I am not allowed to come back until i have written permission to do so from a doctor. I keep having my meds switched and I am sick of being told I need to commit myself. I have a therapist appointed by my boss that I have to see Monday.
Honestly, I am at the end of my road… I don’t think there is any hope for me. And I am tired of this nightmare that I cannot escape.
Just wanted to give an update.
With pay is good news. You weren’t just fired with no hope and kicked to the curb. The fact that your boss appointed a therapist is sort of good news, to someone like me.
I’m on the out side looking in, and I know you’ve been working so hard to manage your own life with out all the medaling, but I’ve seen so many people just get tossed aside to live or die at will with no help, no out reach, no resource that it’s really very good news that your being offered some help.
Thank you for posting in. I’ve been worried about you.
Thanks for the update, I was wondering how it was going with you… Its really hard when the meds are switched; the trial and error phase. I hope you find a med that works for you and soon!
I’m glad your work is so understanding and will let you rest and still pay you, too. Take advantage of this time to rest and get back on your feet. I wish my sister’s boss was as understanding, because she is also at her wit’s end and needs to rest and get help. I wish you wouldn’t be so negative about resting in hospital, but it is your choice, and at least if you are at home, K can look after you and help you, too. There IS hope, it is lying in wait for you somewhere, I hope for you that you will soon see better days!
I’m rooting for you! 
Hey @sasha, I just wanted to let you know I care,and want to see the best for you. Suspended with pay is a good sign. I personally lost the diagnosis of sz. It took a trip to the emergency room after a massive seizure, and a great attending doctor who diagnosed me with temporal lobe epilepsy. The temporal lobe controls sights and sounds, and he deduced that was causing my hallucinations. I’ve been on Depakote, and no hallucinations. All I’m saying is sometimes you have to think outside the box. I wish you the best of luck, and please keep us posted.
Suspended with pay is a very good sign. 
Guess who’s name was not listed on the employee schedule last week? 
I have not been feeling too well in the mood department @sasha - but I am just going to have to place my trust in my doctor. I will communicate to her how exactly I am feeling, hopefully there will be some relief.
Hang in there, and getting suspended with pay is a good sign - see the therapist they give you and continue to be brave, I am sure that relief is around the corner for you too. Wishing you well
well being paid while you’re gone is perfect to put yourself in the hospital, sasha…? just do it…you’ll thank me later…
@sasha i am glad that you are still here.
things do get better.
from my knowledge of what you have said on here…
were you not sexually abused ?..therefore you would have ptsd…this is what i am being treated for with cbt, it is helping me heaps.
it is reducing my ocd, self hatred etc…
just a thought .
take care