Oh, very sorry! I think I had you confused with Anna with no number after her name very sorry!!!
I feel terrible!
I mean with the school thing I’m sorry.
I’m not the brightest today. I should quit while I’m ahead.
Its me who is sorry now lad,really!!! I still almost shout to others sometimes, i became verbally aggressive. Its me who didnt get what is fierce. Its ok now,it was my fault…
I started reading “the prisoner” from Kurt vonnegut. I havent the senses anymore to understand if its a good or a bad book,i just read to occupy my brain…idk why i am dumb like this lol 
. My doc suspects a depression but it could be the degradation of my personnality too.
Kerli, do you function normally now? Me too,all the neighbourhood knows that i am crazy i suppose but its not a big help lol:smile:
.
1 Like
That’s about a guy that’s a POW? Keeping your brain occupied is good. To be honest I used to have more motivation to read. I don’t know if it’s the Sza or that I’m not young anymore and books don’t often seem “new”.
I’m reading a book about how important evolution is. It’s by Bill Nye. You’ve probably never heard of this but he had a tv show teaching young people about science. He’s also good at explaining things to adults. It’s called "Undeniable"
I guess it’s probably not an international book.
Sometimes I have a thing where I don’t know if stuff is good or bad, It’s not dumb, just different.
You’ve talked about having friends and even a boyfriend before. All during your illness! Personally Anna, I think you are better off than you think. I have no friends at all for example. So don’t forget what you already have. You count Anna, you’re part of the club. Of fun social people.
Thank you gorrister, you are very kind. I was weak in the past. Believe me or not,but too good to be happy. My friends climbed on my head a bit in the past cause i was too weak and too good in a dumb way… i suffered because of this. This bf also didnt take me seriously. He told me once he would sleep with my ill friend,yeah. It was a schock for me at the time… whatever,nice to hear that i am still part of the club, youppieee!!! Its nice my lithium isnt it?! I am kidding… its still not what it should be i find. I feel dumb idk why. I just dont get the things. I am afraid of this “disability”…
2 Likes
Meds helped me with psychotic symtpoms. That is all. They didn’t help me with negative symptoms, they didn’t help me with social life.
Therapy did help me with negative symptoms and social life.
But I don’t have social anxiety, paranoia, cognitive problems etc. Maybe my situation is easier…
I send you hugs Anna1 !! Always believe in yourself !! You are not dumb !!
1 Like
Im in the same sit, I have been in isolation a lot the last 6 years.
2 Likes
Thank you Andrey 
Yes, I guess your situation is easier. My ex doc said in my back to my mom that ill always suffer because of the negatives. cause they dont know how to treat them. This is sad… I have cognitive issues for sure, memory problems too. The others are fastly pissed off by me sometimes cause I keep asking some ■■■■ sometimes now. and it hurts me. the paranoia is very painful thing too. whatever. I try to still have hope.
@ChrisJack, we should keep trying without being hard on ourselves that’s all. kisses
Small steps, Anna1. This is the best solution.
Every day, make small efforts to improve.
You like to read, right?
Read some psychology books, they could help you understand yourself and others.
You like to dance?
Dance 10 minutes a day. Feel more free.
Small steps. And a little bit of courage.
Hugs 
Took me 8 months to venture out. Now im only to be seen down the pub. My only social life is there in the pub. I know im gonna get moaned at for spending a good portion of my benefits on beer, but its the only social aspect i have.And i am actually happy with that. I manage to have a laugh and i can then sit in the rest od the day. Before tho - i was just too paranoid and anxious, im makeing the most of feeling well…Sod the pen pushers that say im wasting my money. Its a personal indepedenace payment. At my mind im maintaining my independance and happiness in a pub!
Hi I have found that if you can find mental health or other kinds of support groups in the Uk it’s MIND and RETHINK they offer support groups for people experiencing mental,health difficulties. It’s difficult at first but then all of a sudden you catch yourself enjoying meeting new people. It’s ok to be afraid it’s ok to be you. You can gain that through support groups.and NO PRESSURE