Do you understand what mental cruelty is?

Because for a long time I couldn’t understand it. Now, I do some.

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my brother and father in law are masters at mental cruelty. they make me feel like ■■■■, and they know it too.

I also couldn’t understand “don’t know any better”.

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that’s my mom’s and mother in law’s excuses for them. “they don’t know any better” or “that’s just R being R”

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Estranged from my family as there support throughout all this was push me away, question my sanity and treat me like a lost cause. I was going backwards like 30 years every time I was around them. Goodbye to bad rubbish I hope they burn in hell. Can’t help but worry for the future of my niece though.

All married men do. :grin:

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I know. Its like, i could never be intentionally cruel to people, either by words or actions. I feel awful when someone close to me feels uncomfortable … If I dislike the person or for whatever reasons I just cut it off.
But my bf was intentionally cruel and I know lot of people who were too.
I think it is basically a sign of inferiority complex. He couldn’t stand that I’m better than him in every area, only physically weaker.

Yes I deal with it every day with a spouse that bullies me, then denies and gaslights.
He doesnt know tho I have less than 8 months until I can move out and he will no longer have me as a victim for his sick little mind game.

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Deal with it here on a regular basis, If ill it can drive me to the edge of insanity.

That’s a good insight - that it has to do with an inferiority complex. I hadn’t thought of that. Thank you.

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Glad you’re planning your escape. Be safe.

Many are unfortunately victims in their own families, and feel unable to break away because it’s family. I finally cut my sister out of my life. I don’t wish her harm. I wish her well actually, but it will have to be away from me. I’ve put up with too much for too long.

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I like the comment that it’s because it is family . Good insight.

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My husband was the master.

He would torture our son too, the ■■■■■■■.

Well Son finally grew up just fine and knows what went down. He was able to escape because I was able to pay his rent. Now he has a good job and checks in to make sure I’m not being ■■■■■■ with.

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i think mental cruelty is maybe what sz is, how it effects us and causes us anguish, where it comes from i dont know, i dont blame anyone or anything that could be to blame bc its just the cards that i have been dealt in life and i need to accept that.

Not blame but finding a reason is a good effort.

In my opinion there is no reason except the laws of random occurance and that is something that is very hard to measure,

I have a feeling I brought this on myself though, I lost touch with reality bc I was having a hard time,

I am definitely of the idea that sz being is cause and effect thing.

Maybe it is different for different people bc my parents were good people and I have no complaints against the way I was brought up so I guess it was down to me,

No man is an island. You are a reflection of your parents.