Ny father would say “Don’t raise your voice.” when we were arguing.
I realize, now, that I get lost if I raise my voice. Louder isn’t really any more effective but it probably beats going mute.
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I try never to raise my voice, I like to stay calm.
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i can not raise my voice.even in highest pitch doesn t give intented effect.i m more calm person
Unfortunately I do. Although I am not as bad as I used to be. For one thing I don’t get angry very often anymore. Rarely.
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I sometimes sound angry when I’m feeling a lot of anxiety. To relax, I do alternate nostril breathing before I have to make important phone calls.
Only when Sam runs off after a wild animal, into the woods or towards traffic. Otherwise, I don’t raise my voice.
Yes, when I’m real mad!
I also start cursing…
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No I don’t raise my voice. 
Nope, and I tend to find it hilarious when other people do it. It’s as if they think increasing the volume of their voice will make their point more valid lol. Or they just lack self control, which itself is also funny.
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No I don’t raise my voice. My mother used to shout very loud
I admit I have raised my voice a lot to my eldest son. He is in the terrible twos at the moment.
What I won’t do is ever spank them though.
But yeah I have raised my voice a bit.
You simply are wired differently if you think this way. People who raise their voice when angry don’t do it on purpose. Also when your dog runs away or your kid does something stupid that’s agitation, not anger, it can feel similar but full on anger comes with indignation and resentment… When you are agitated you actually raise your voice but when you are angry it’s not an impulse, it’s an instinct.
It’s not a conscious choice, the conscious choice is to lower your voice, if you can even manage. It’s not impulse control, there is no impulse to raise your voice, the anger simply translates your normal voicing to a higher tone without you even trying. It’s like having a hard time speaking while threatened, it’s not that you have the impulse to shut up or to stutter, your normal functioning gets translated to a different behaviour and bloody speaking becomes hard because forcing you to not display yourself as dangerous while threatened can save your life. I used to have to stutter insults at my bullies, which would beat me more for it, and often I couldn’t even reach something audible and had to just resort to spitting in their faces to make my point. It’s not a choice, I had to literally give it everything I had for the words not to get stuck in my mouth and there is no difference with the raised voice while angry, and I mean actually angry, not agitated.
It’s very immature of you to have this view of anger issues, I hope you don’t extend your views to fear, anxiety and all other emotions that affect your behaviour against your will. Be better or people will really have no reason to show empathy towards you when it comes to your own struggles with mental illness.
P.S. Yes, I raise my voice when angry. If I am angry we are past me caring about your point of view. I have been angry very few times in my life, you can count them in one hand. I already understood your point of view and decided it’s not worth my respect. When I am angry I ain’t discussing anything, I want you to understand that you crossed my bottomline and raising my voice does just that. Even assuming that I could speak without raising my voice, I wouldn’t want to for your own safety and my own wellbeing. The more I contain the manifestation of my anger the more my impulse control worsens and the stakes rise, and if provoked after containing my anger raising my voice wouldn’t be enough to avoid taking a sledgehammer to my sanity, I’d be probably forced to escalate things physically or take a very significant backlash to my mental health. People who don’t understand this dynamic have no right to criticize others for raising their voice while angry, in fact they can’t even say they understand what being angry means, and raising my voice allows you to act like a prick in response without things turning violent or me having a stroke. It’s a win win because 9/10 when I am angry at you, you’ll act like a prick about it because that’s what you are. I am not putting that much faith in the response of somebody I am already angry with. It’s downright reckless to gamble my sanity or risk jailtime because I wanted to speak a bit more calmly when my emotions are literally priming me to either get you to submit or kill you, because that’s anger. If you knew what actual anger feels like you wouldn’t be chuckling at the self control of somebody that is merely raising his voice from the getgo but not escalating things further as you act unrestrained.
Are you responding to my thread or someone else’s comment?
I realize that my father’s not wanting me to be loud was that it scared him which was what I wasn’t prepared to know.
Kinda sounds like they’re responding to me mocking people who yell when angry.
I suppose because both of my parents were bipolars who refused meds and would yell and scream at us kids at the drop of a hat, I started finding it comical. Sorry if this offends anyone 
, but it can be fun to watch someone get loud like that, because you pretty much can see their intelligence decrease as the volume of their voice increases, which amuses me. Makes them that much less effective in debating/arguing. Advantage: freakonaleash 
I know, no one’s ever just a prick anymore, it’s always some load of bs like “anger issues.”
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No one’s ever just lazy anymore, it’s always some load of bs like “negative symptoms”.
Yes, I was responding to you, sorry for not realizing it wasn’t properly replying, I started replying to you and then reduced the reply and clicked the standard reply button to open it back up and apparently that changes things, good to know.
As far as screaming to your kids and your spouse, that’s often agitation, stress, habits, irritation and exasperation, a propensity to anger makes similar over-reactions engrained even with less dominant emotions out of habit in many individuals who decide to deal with them with short outbursts of anger. That’s a form of maladaptive behaviour.
People see an angry face or a violent outburst and think anger but often in our modern day the conditions only allow for very partial forms of anger and even completely unrelated emotions like panic get easily tagged as anger, because that’s what we do with anything that involves a raised voice or violence, but if you aren’t suffering from severe anger issues, that are most definitely a detriment to your life, that’s rarely the case. Anger is very hard to deal with as an emotion, especially if you are bipolar. Raising your voice is an adaptation to anger, not to the situation, and as much as we dislike it, it’s preferable to suppressing your anger in most cases. Anger is a very old emotion that’s not very well suited to the modern day, almost any instance of feeling angry qualifies as an issue for the person.
I don’t know why you keep looking down on people with anger issues and making light of their experience.
Impulse control isn’t even a quality of the person so I don’t know why you’d draw a sense of superiority from yours, a little exposure to lead et voila bye bye impulse control. It’s like intelligent people looking down on others for their intelligence as though they had anything to do with how they came to be intelligent.
Look I’m happy for you that you drew a good hand when it comes to your anger response for what concerns adaptation to our society, now maybe try to empathize with others about something you don’t experience(with anger at least) instead of going around throwing judgment. Anger issues are already among the most stigmatized issues on the planet with hardly anyone caring about the perspective of people experiencing anger. Considering the stigma about schizophrenia is connected to very similar stuff, I don’t know what kind of twisted sense of schadenfraude you feel when not extending them the courtesy others deny us as well.
I am not saying anger issues don’t often end up causing problems bigger than themselves but they are true issues and treating them like straight up personal faults isn’t helpful, same for low impulse control and low intelligence. I’m glad you didn’t develop similar maladaptive behaviours growing up in that household, maybe this relation with anger issues is just what was needed for you to not normalize the behaviour for yourself.
You might be shocked to find out that the vast majority of people treats individuals with schizophrenia as suffering from low impulse control and anger issues. That stigma is our own even if we never so much as raise our voice, helping people eat that load of bs on “anger issues” would be very beneficial to how people perceive schizophrenia. Alas, if taking the piss out of angry people takes precedence, I’ll understand.
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I do.
But I would love to change this habit
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I very rarely raise my voice, even in a disagreement. But I have done it.
I don’t engage when I am angry. I get off by myself and sulk.
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Me too @crimby… I kind of close off. I used to raise my voice and it was really hard to control my anger… I have worked hard to change it.
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That’s what I do when someone starts to lie to win an argument. I don’t sulk as much as I just have to think that it is futile.
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