I struggle with activities that involve just my own company. Like reading a book, or going to the gym. I don’t like being with just my own mind that also includes night time going to bed. It feels a bit unsettling. I am reminded much more of my negative symptoms during my own company. And scared of the idea of positives creeping up on me.
Being around others is more essential to me now than it was before psychosis;
I don’t like that it feels like I’m dependant on having others to feel safe. It was not like that before
And it is ironic because now I find it harder to be around people with this depression.
@gene@rogueone I’m glad u guys enjoy ur alone time, I guess I do like the flexibility aspect of it. And thanks for the pet tip: I do have a cat but she doesn’t make me feel safe lol. But yea she’s better than nothing. She does give me reassuring looks.
My voices get pretty bad when I’'m left alone with my thoughts or doing a simple task by myself. They aren’t
usually as intrusive when I’m around people so I do enjoy being around people more these days. I know what you mean about worrying about depending on people. My parents are getting old and I’m applying for disability right now because I can’t work. I don’t know whats going to happen when they’re gone. I worry about ending up as a crazy homeless person on the streets.
I do enjoy my lonesome… but eventually I get tired of my own voice and then I start to go crazy.
It’s just about right after I reflect on who I was before coming down with the illness… then I really start to loathe sitting around alone, because I am left with nothing but acknowledging who I am now… and the difference is pretty unkind… Now that I am a madman I basically gotta let all the goofballery through just for balance… yet the goofballery does lead to my embarassment.
… perhaps not so delusional any more… but certainly unrealistic regarding humor.
I find its easier to overcome avolition when with company cuz ur brain stays active around ppl. When i’m alone my mind is in a deep meditative dissociated state and its hard to wanna activate it
Most of the time I prefer solitude than being around people. When I was alone I can do things productively: reading, making notes, writing or listening to music, watching a movie. I don’t have negative symptoms bothering me.
I can understand you @anon90843118 your brain and body don’t function well when you are occupied with lots of negative symptoms including anxiety, agitations, fatigue, and lack of concentration. If your brain can’t do reading then certainly you can’t enjoying being alone.
Thanks for understanding… I am going to attempt reading a book again and we will see.
I’m so happy for u that these symptoms don’t bother u. It definitely makes a difference
I take Amisulpride 200mg daily. This med gives me agitation, fatigue which holds me from sitting quietly reading a book. I take grape seeds extraction and Alpha GPC to alleviate my agitation, fatigue and to increase my attention span. It works for me. Hope my experience can be useful to you.
