Many times in my life I feel I have been given a life I don’t deserve. Like how, when I got sick, I had to get a job bagging groceries and consider group home even though I could otherwise be doing something very useful with my life like teach? I was stuck watching as people became lawyers or doctors, though I eventually found my own friends and learned to be happy with what I have. I feel like my ex had one simple dream. He wanted a happy family because he never had one growing up. He works as a security guard at a hotel and watches others marry good husbands and wives and take their kids on vacation. Personally, I am not jealous of jack squat because I like my new life post-illness. There is a huge stigma against ugly women and unsuccessful men, not to be rude but people will act accordingly. I worry about my ex. He mumbled to me something about how the big fish bully everyone and take all the fish food and the little ones are dying. Can we have a genuine discussion about this?
I feel like my life has been half unfair to me and half overly generous. I’m not complaining.
Life has been fair to me financially and physically but not so fair emotionally or mentally. 
I have a lot going for me in terms of how I’m treated/viewed by society. So no complaints there.
Life isn’t fair.
You’re not enduring anything special,
Everyone struggles.
Time to stop wallowing in self pity and start making some positive changes in your life.
Well I know the reason I haven’t done much mainly isn’t my fault. Do I think I’m treated unfairly? Well I think I’m treated like mostly anyone else would be in my situation. It kind of sucks that in most situations when people judge me I can’t tell them why I am where I am in life.
I can’t remember, did you say you weren’t from mainland US? Where I live is very rural, and someone like your ex would probably do ok for himself if we’re just going by the fact that he is a security guard. Assuming he can do that full time.
But if you don’t work full time or especially if you don’t work at all, women won’t likely be attracted to you here. Unless there’s drugs involved at some point. Like my mom talks about some woman from work and rather than the actual messed up stuff her co workers boyfriend is doing the first thing she always mentions is that he doesn’t work.
IDK what I could have been if it weren’t for Sza. Probably I’d be normal but unspectacular. I’m sure my unrelated health issues could still make things rough.
So…I mean I’m not happy about being unemployed or single. I can’t really blame this on society.
Does it suck that even if i can work part time I’m going to have a difficult time finding a mate?
Definitely. But it’s not as if there is ill will. People act the way evolution and culture determine in most cases. It’s not as if I’ve tried very hard to find a mate so far. It’s the very reasoned and logical conclusion that the odds are overwhelmingly pointing to it not being worth it at this point.
Like sometimes I notice women at my treatment center and think “wow she’s cute” or “She doesn’t look bad, she looks attainable” but I don’t introduce myself for fear of being seen as a creep. I mean I would never, never straight up just hit on women in that setting.
At times I feel like there probably isn’t much for me in life. But in another year or two I should reach the top of the waiting list for Section 8. So there’s that. And maybe I can work part time in the next year or two.
But I don’t think love is in the cards for me and i wanted to experience that at least once in my life.
Yes, I see that…
What happens when there’s drugs involved again?
Life dealt me a shitty hand of cards either fight or ill get kicked to the curb. Lifesa bitch but while you’re here, make the best of it.
I have the two best “former” stray dogs in the world
Basically almost any time I have personally known of a woman here that stays with a guy long term, excluding old guys, there were drugs involved at some point. They met in rehab or they were on drugs while they were together.
I meant that’s long term jobless.(from the beginning)
Picking my brain almost 20 years ago I met a couple where the guy was vision impaired and the gal had some disability.
They seemed very happy.
Well I mean I’m sure some women will stick with you if you lose your ability to work. Start out that way and you’re screwed 96/100 times.
A man that makes me laugh, I find attractive! I can’t drink and have a carrot up my ass cuz I used to be so so sick…scared of ever being that way again…
What do you mean?
I’ve been at every end of the spectrum…now I’m uptight and manic…no real carrot. I’ve been very sick in like every disorder except drug abuse
The past die in a 
Tbh honest some of the things you say sound elitist, thinking one person’s career, looks or living situation are superior to another and that having the status you want will make you automatically happy.
I can’t make any conclusions about what your society, you probably know your community the best, but there are many cross sections and as many different opinions about what constitutes a the high life as there are individuals. Success and the value of not being ugly are relative observations.
In sz sometimes we do not reach our full productive potential, whatever you value, because of it. We don’t end up in the job or career we want. This even happens to neurotypicals too, who might for example want to be president of the United States, but had to just settle for vice president or powerful business executive. Human life is filled with setbacks and disappointments, most people have the strength and maturity to keep living life regardless of these.
One of my favorite bands said in one of their songs:
“No one in the world ever gets what they want and that is beautiful everybody dies frustrated and sad and that is beautiful. They want what they’re not…”
Life does not owe your ex anything. Even if you he is successful or otherwise. Moreover, there are plenty of “successful” individuals who are unhappy with their lives. My dentist, for example, talked about how he found life unfulfilling and would like to have worked as a mechanic, or building houses, something more hands on because the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
It sounds like your ex has what they call in psychology “cognitive distortions”:
Don’t let the poisonous thoughts of your ex contaminate YOUR outlook on life. Encourage him to get therapy and leave him behind, continuing to live life as you want to.
Tbh honest it just sounds like he upset about losing you and saying things he doesn’t mean. Tell him to get in a job and setting where his ego is stroked. Someone who is starving for attention will feel inadequate surrounded by celebrities and popular people for example.
You did the right thing in adapting to your setbacks by making new friends. Sometimes old friends can be elitist and won’t treat you the same because you aren’t on the same social or professional rung as them. In that case it can be better to make friends with people who treat you like a valuable human being, and not an ally in some struggle to “win” at life.
And don’t listen to typical wealthy capitalists telling you to “toughen up, and every man for himself”, or whatever.
Every society has different values, don’t be fooled into thinking the values of any individual represent the sentiment of every person.
Don’t be ashamed to voice your frustration, you’re obviously going through life changes which would distress anyone. Sz is not a fun thing to have for most of us.
Trying to catch up on taxes and paperwork today. I have a headache. Need more coffee…
Sorry @Anon10 I couldn’t read of all that…But I feel you. ! 