Do you feel like you don’t know how to sound enthusiastic about life experiences?

I’ve been listening to interview podcasts
I could not sell myself like these high achievers

I tried writing my life story as though for an interview and took out all my usual negativity and self derogation
If that’s a word

There wasn’t humour, pride, expression of fun,
Or even a sense I’d had a good time it was just flat

I’m going to keep working on it but maybe this is just Anhedonea (sp?)
So flat

Think I’m suffering from internet social media jealousy


I know what you mean.

I had a friend that was enthusiastic about everything. It was interesting seeing things through his eyes.

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People keep saying I beat high competition to be temporarily accepted to this prestigious uni but honestly I don’t feel happy. I feel like I’m flat too. Honestly people would be so excited if they were me.

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I just tell myself I don’t have to be amongst the best or have the most success. Just have to focus on doing my best with the cards I’m dealt even though they may not be very good.

Can’t blame myself for things that are out of my control.


I’m still just exploring in my head how to not make excuses with every good thing I say about myself

Out of feeling intimidated I reason that it isn’t that great
… because I just had to go to hospital afterwards
… because it wasn’t mainstream, it was for troubled people
… because I had so much help from my mum

I’m trying to streamline this attitude recognising basic achievements
But even after that there is no joy or heart to it

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Perhaps schizophrenia stops people being bubbley


I’ve never been bubbly. I have a good life but nothing brag worthy as I am not super successful in a career nor did I ever fall madly in love. So I can’t brag in either respect that people tend to brag.

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Maybe you could try to seperate the positive and negative in your mind. I know that sounds weird, but I think that’s what I do. When I am in a positive mode I almost never get into the negative side of life, and when I decide to steam I try to let it all out so I won’t have to revisit the negative side for a while.

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Your approach makes a lot of sense.
I’ve not really got a philosophy of that but my cycle can dictate
I get one bad day, about 4 to10 good days and a bunch of averages
I think I need an attitude change

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Yes it is possible to change, although it may be hard and take practice.

Maybe the reason it is easy for me is because I have a very simple life. I spend a lot of time alone and I only spend time with people I mostly get along with. Often I have found that I get thrown off my cool if I deal with people who have a negative attitiude towards me, and this can make things hard.

But I try not to mix positive and negative feelings, I try to stay in one emotional world at a time.

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Schizophrenia/meds made me boring and a zombie with no emotions other than anger. I am not enthusiastic and full of energy anymore. Severe negative symptoms.

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