I feel like I’m noticing things, odd things, and they are starting to feed into some odd beliefs. I shake it off quickly but It’s starting to get my attention. I mean it’s adding up to something. I fear I’m vulnerable enough to start believing it if I’m not careful. Why? Am I going insane? How is it that I can see it’s not true but start to believe it anyway?
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Yes, I began noticing cars with tinted windows and then of course I saw them everywhere and it was scary.
Once you start noticing things you’ll see those things everywhere.
“Do you ever feel like you’re on the verge of forming a delusion?”
Short answer, yes.
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I have had the same delusion for 14 years now. The government gave me schizophrenia.
There may have been something wrong with me contrary to my initial beliefs but they intentionally made me worse.
And I know that’s not a delusion. That’s reality.
I feel I’m always one step to falling back into my old delusion. I’ll get random signs and religion is triggering and most people in groups are very devout and loud. So it gets me going usually. I just keep myself from going into research mode and on the edge of the line.
Yeah i almost always maintain enough insight to not let it become a problem though. Usually if im slipping back into complete psychosis, there are certain feelings and vibes that start to happen alongside the thoughts. When i start to get like that i know i need to get help soon otherwise ill lose all insight and become insane again. Basically theres a big difference for me between having delusions and staying chill or delusions and getting scared or starting to freak out over them. I feel the meds just make me not care as much when i experience psychotic symptoms. So im able to get through the day with meds despite the illness. I dunno if that makes sense but there ya go.
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