When I was living at this therapeutic community we’d have these community meetings where 40 + people would sit on these benches in a circle and we’d raise and discuss issues and at the end someone would grant “George” (a stuffed whatever he was)
Anyway, I began to feel myself feeling a high over the presence of all these people and I would sometimes see energies or something in the sky above me as if it were the northern lights. Well, there were times when I would go into a sort of trance and begin to sing…songs neither I nor anyone else had heard…yet.
I don’t expect the more, I don’t want to say rationally minded as I consider myself pretty rationally minded, but whatever the name for people who believe only in what can be proved beyond a doubt by current science and believe all else beyond this is imposible and does not exist. These people I don’t expect to believe me.
But I sang this song, this beautiful song, it just came to me, and when asked who it was by I gave a name, a name I didn’t know. They looked up the name afterwards and he was real, from my neck of the woods and the song, not an old one or one I could have heard, was up on youtube. I’d never heard of him in my life, but realized way back before his singer/songwriter days he’d played in a local punkrock band that I’d gone to see a few times.
I never heard voices, rarely, in my teens, sometimes I heard a girl’s voice pleasantly call my name. But then I remembered going to see his punk band the first time with my girlfriend and my best friend at the time. I heard, this had never happened before back then, the lead singer, the guy who’s song I was to somehow channel in my mid 20’s, say in my mind “Dude, you have a halo” He said it a few times.
Anyway, another time at that community during a meeting one of the staff, someone with no history of mental illness, an EMT and volunteer firefighter, sitting directly across from me went white as a ghost, got up and walked away. I later learned he’d vividly seen as if he was there Abraham Lincoln standing directly behind me. He quit all positions that week, quit work.
I don’t know. I know I sound crazy, but then I’ve heard all sorts of people without any history of mental illness tell stories just as crazy about stuff that happened to them. There’s more, a ton more. And no, I’m not currently suffering from delusions or whatever they’d wish to throw at me, I’m just recounting an experience or two from my past. I don’t dwell on these things or come up with crazy theories about them. I just occasionally look back on them and wonder, then move on.