Symptoms of depersonalization/derealization disorder are usually episodic and wax and wane in intensity. Episodes may last for only hours or days or for weeks, months, or sometimes years .
(Google)
Nihilistic delusions, also known as délires de négation, are specific psychopathological entities characterized by the delusional belief of being dead, decomposed or annihilated, having lost one’s own internal organs or even not existing entirely as a human being. (Google)
Early I had a nihilistic idea like a delusion that everything was fake abd meaningless, signified nothing. Everything society believed in was nothing but playing make believe and only fools were pretenders in the stupid rituals
I’m not sure what to say @Om_Sadasiva. Probably a better question for your doctor than for me. All I can tell you is that you don’t sound well a lot of the time.