I am so depressed now. I don’t know if I will ever be happy again. I have to take meds the rest of my life or I will be hospitalized. I’ve been either arrested or hospitalized often against my will 30 times. I have been restrained about 46 times or so there. Unjustly. They treated me horribly in there! I dropped out of college and never finished. I am on the no fly list and believe I could be being tortured from a remote location by psychopaths! They never stop either! Its 24/7! They threaten me and my family! I feel so cursed. I have been unemployed for years now.
I’m sorry life is so hard. Please don’t give up, though. Things really can get better. I used to be chronically homeless, but that all changed once I finally found the right combination of meds for me. It took ten years, but I now finally have control of my life again.
Try not to judge your life based on what You would have if you never got sick. You have unique challenges to overcome, and success will mean something different for you now. It doesn’t mean you can’t eventually have all the things you want, but for now, start small. Work on getting your medication under control. Work with a therapist or counselor on your delusional beliefs. CBT helps many folks here with their delusions. I do biofeedback therapy to help me with mine. There are tons of options out here to help you get your illness under control. Things can get better.
Dont give up! I have had years of feeling extremely depressed, suicidal and in psychotic terror and going in and out of hospitals. My (idiot of a) psychiatrist even told me and my parents that she taught I soon wouldnt be among the living anymore and they sort of gave up on me.
I’m still having my bouts of darkness, but also long periods of feeling stable and happy enough to sing out loud on my bicycle and play games with my son and volunteer and see friends and family.
Every time I feel bad I forget the good times and fully believe I have always been like this and will always be and the darkness will never lift.
But it is not true. Better days will come. Dont give up the search for a right med or therapy and a better life. It is possible!
1 Like
This topic was automatically closed 90 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.