I just can’t control it. I have horrible thoughts about hurting others. I’ve always had these and the voices encourage me to take the next step. I want to be good. I don’t want to hurt anyone. But, this rage inside is so powerful. I can’t explain it. It’s almost addicting. I hate myself at the same time. The only time I ever acted them out was when I was a young girl. I would run after my little brother with knives in my hand.
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Tell your pdoc this immediately!
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I go see him on Thursday.
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You know I can only give you my experience. I suffer from these horrid thoughts and the impulse on doing them. I try to accept these feelings and acknowledge them, try to reason them out. But then I go do something that will help me digest my thoughts, I go and occupy my mind immediately. Because these thoughts are of urgent matter I haven’t told my Psychiatrist yet but I will soon and I encourage you do too! I hope these words help, or at least make you feel like you are not alone.
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Thank you @anon97970229 I’m going to tell my pdoc this Thursday.
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Sorry you’re having dark thoughts. Do you have a prn you can take.
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I don’t at the moment. The only thing I’ve been taking to calm down and go to sleep is Ativan.
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Can you call your doctor right away @Cici2?
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Is it rage or more intrusive and ocd type thinking?
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It’s like uncontrollable rage. I have antisocial personality disorder on top of Schizophrenia so I get these violent thoughts. I usually get them when I’m bored. @Wave I can try and call tomorrow. I know my pdoc is really busy after the 4th of July. I was lucky to get Thursday. But I’ll keep trying.
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Hang in there @Cici2!
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If you did intense exercise to tire yourself out does the rage dissipate?
I’ve had the intrusive violent thoughts and images many times it’s related to ocd
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Thanks @Wave. @anon31257746 I will get on the treadmill and listen to some music. Hopefully they’ll calm down or just go away.
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You can do it hope you feel better soon it will pass !
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I have these thoughts too. To the point that I sometimes obsess about it. I’ve never taken it to the next step but my voices tend to get louder. My pdoc said it’s some kind of OCD. As long as we are only having the thoughts and not taking action on it it’s okay.
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Thanks @anon31257746 and @Longhorn21 I hate these thoughts. I hope my pdoc can help me soon.
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I’m not trying to play doctor just speaking from experience. Vraylar is very good at squashing these kind of thoughts and impulses. Not sure why, but I was on 3mg and was having violent impulses and nonstop suicidal thoughts. My doc raised me to 4.5mg and within a couple of days all of that was gone. I haven’t had those kinds of thoughts since. So it must have fixed whatever part of my brain that was causing them.
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I’ll ask my doc about Vraylar.
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hey @Cici2 sounds like you have low serotonin, i would google ways to increase it. Exercise is one way but regular light daily exercise is better than running fast because it keep it steadier. Other quick things you can do is drink milk, avoid sugar spikes, speak with a friend, cry, take a bath and more. Theres many things you can do dont worry.
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Thanks @anon92887483 I will try these remedies.
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