I had a psychotic break about two weeks ago but now it seems like something that happened to someone else. I feel like my experience wasn’t real and that I basically imagined the whole thing.
The thing is, I’m a mental health clinician so I know what I’m experiencing is psychosis-related. I can tell my loved ones and myself that people can’t really read my mind and that my phone company probably isn’t paying special attention to me. But I can’t believe it. It’s like I spend most of my time arguing with myself about what I’m experiencing.
I guess I would just like to know if this is something others have struggled with. It’s only my second break and the first one only lasted 2-3 weeks so I haven’t gotten an actual diagnosis besides psychosis NOS
Until you get an actual diagnosis, it is really hard to say. As you are aware as a mental health clinician there are so many things it could be.
I am a paranoid schizophrenic. I know that ‘paranoid’ subset is no longer recognized but I still like it because I feel it fits. I will tell you that the thought leaking sounds like what I go through. The phone company thing sounds like the megalomania that I go through as well.
However, you really can’t say and we are not able to diagnose.
You might feel better once you get your dx, whatever it is. When I got mine, I felt like ‘Good, now I have a name for it.’ So just try to remain calm and work with your pdoc and therapist as much as possible.
And if it is schiophrenia, you can get stable and learn to thrive with it.
They started me on risperidone but it made me too sped up then drowsy then sped up, so now I’m tapering off that and trying abilify. I also take wellbutrin for stubborn longstanding major depression
Hm, when I experience psychosis I feel like it’s completely real and anyone who says otherwise is lying. There’s just no way it can’t be real.
But I understand that one can also think it was just imagination…either way, both need to be treated.
Don’t worry so much about Dx either…it took a long time before I was diagnosed with sza.
Yeah I get a lot of stuff like that, like people plotting to ruin my life and there’s this huge conspiracy against me.
I guess I don’t really care about the diagnosis, just looking for a sense of belonging because I can’t share my experiences with my loved ones and I DEFINITELY can’t share with coworkers
Then this is totally the right place for you. The people here are very nice and easy to get along with. I mean, dear god, they put up with me after all.
What meds are you on?