Can I be sad here for a while?

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Where do we begin.
Thoughts segmentated.

I’m not usually a sad person,
wicked sense of humour is always there for me.

now i feel sort of weak,
i wish i had the energy enough to fight this.
i’m no looney
i got the diagnosis, is not a horoscope,
i don’t relate to it, i don’t remember much when i was in crisis,
so it’s maybe more than one.

i’ve been lookin for peers but all i get, when real peers, is annoying people like me,
inadequate, infinite loopfeed.

the voices that i hear are always the dissaproving hate/repugnant voices i get from real people

Echoing.

I know.

i’m disgusting.
i’m sick.
i need to get out of this realm.

I know there is no fix for this here in the conditions i present.

And i wont use the trap card of any god to elude this inferno.

We’re all demons here.

I was born under the infuence of Beelphegor,

i wasn’t looking for him.

All my piety fell slowly trough the years, like lepper of the soul.

If it fell i’m glad my soul is now all bones.

I have what shall remain.

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hope you are feeling better soon
take care