SSRI withdrawal was pretty bad for me. I was on Escitalopram for only 9 months but the withdrawal lasted 3,5 years, I can’t even imagine what it’d be like if I’d been on it for over a decade. Luckily no brain zaps, but anhedonia, anxiety and messed up sexual function, yes, those were the main things but there were other more minor things.
For me it was in what they call “windows”(it’s common for SSRI withdrawal afaik), where when I first quit after maybe a couple of months I’d get a window of feeling better, which at first I think it was maybe a couple of hours or a day. Gradually the windows got longer and the down periods shorter, until 3,5 years in the fluctuations were so small I didn’t notice them. Right now I think I don’t really have them at all anymore.
I read of many people who experienced a prolonged withdrawal that lasted 3+ years. The drug is long out of your system by then obviously but it takes time for the brain to adjust back, I think. Some, lucky, people say their withdrawal wasn’t bad or was much shorter.
I don’t know if I’d recommend reading other people’s experiences of withdrawing, it might scare you. I’m very glad I went trough the process myself though. For me all it did was numb me, it didn’t “lift” me up, I just felt nothing.
Only thing that really helped to speed up the withdrawal process was Licorice Root, you could research it. I had to quit it soon after I tried because bad heart burn. I tried the deglycyrrhizinated version but that had no effect.
What you should do is to titrate really slowly, I’m talking about very slow, like 10 percent at a time, maybe you can tolerate bigger reductions but when I went(almost) cold turkey it really messed me up for at least a year. I think you can buy liquid versions of SSRIs but I’m not sure. Otherwise maybe you can dissolve the pill in water and measure the same amount each time(or rather remove the percentage you want to reduce by, I guess it’d be easier to do with a round number like a liter).
I’d say my pdoc is great but even she wasn’t well versed in withdrawing, she told me to take half a pill for a week and then quit the next week. The speed of reducing is a matter of how much you can tolerate.
Good Luck!