I feel as that I understand schizophrenia decently well enough, secondarily bipolar disorder, but there seems to be a diagnosis that I’ve been totally unexposed to.
From what I’ve seen there is a lot of overlap in symptoms between the various mental illnesses.
I think it could help others out just as much as I to have some insights in borderline personality disorder (BPD).
Anyone care to share their experiences in dealing with a BPD individual or having the diagnosis themselves?
There’s a thing, about personality disorders being mental illnesses, some say yes, some say no. I think not, they’re treatable in therapy and without meds.
I know someone with bpd. They take meds . It helps them have a smoother ride instead of a torrent of emotions. And also dbt therapy
They can be fairly reactive. Dwell on negative. Over think.
Typical stuff that sensitive and emotional people have.
But it’s like having the emotion dial turned up a few notches
For me my BPD issues get activated by interpersonal stress. This could be with family, or at work dealing with other staff, or even just trying to get a prescription filled at the pharmacy. I’m basically hypersensitive to invalidation and manipulation attempts, veerrry defensive, and I also have trust issues so bad it causes “splitting”. I suck at dealing with stress and dissociate easily or get cognitive dissonance problems. The unstable sense of self is a thing, and I have a history of self-harming behavior, too. I’ve never been diagnosed with BPD because I don’t fit the stereotypes of reenacting The Exorcist in front of professionals, I might be the “quiet borderline” or whatever the ■■■■.
My pdoc thinks it’s really autism, I don’t even know anymore. But BPD is like a type of pervasive paranoia that comes with a constant plaguing avalanche of “what if” thoughts. The worst possibility is often taken as reality. It feels like constantly being under attack and like everyone is an emotional predator, just waiting to stab you in the back somehow. “I hope you’re having a good day,” feels like some kind of threat and manipulation attempt, like, “You had better be having a good day because nobody wants to deal with your emotions, you worthless piece of trash.” This is what my mind does a lot, anyway.
Lately it hasn’t been as bad on Risperidone because this med is really chilling me the hell out.
I don’t think many professional like the label of the diagnosis. It is rather non-specific…
I’m just beginning to learn about this… From what I’ve heard though the borderline doesn’t mean you are on the border of having a personality disorder. The borderline is meant to indicate that you are stuck with part neurosis and part psychosis.
So it’s a blurry and misunderstood condition. With all the overlaps on top of that, doesn’t help make it any clearer.
Thanks for the responses. Especially @Turnip… I’m glad to hear a med has helped calm the stress responses.
This was also mentioned to me. Helps with the impulse control which keeps individuals in the veins of life that prolong and perpetuate their issues.
DBT/CBT exercises are useful but often hard. The ones that try to challenge your perceptions and get you to “think outside” the catastrophe box, feel like assaults on what little sense of self you have left, it’s like you’re being encouraged to manipulate yourself which can feel very triggering if you grew up in a very manipulative/invalidating environment. The ones that focus more on just changing behavior are easier, so I would say to start with those.
They’re also kind of like beta fish. Don’t want to put two of them in the same room/tank (fireworks!).
Not at first, at first we fall madly in love. Then it turns into The Shining.
I kind of had to throw out my concept of identity when the SZ hit me. Resolved down to just trying to do what’s right.
So identity issues kind escape me. I can see the sense in trying to change the only things you’re holding onto could trigger massive defensiveness.
Having gone through a few of those changes though, I always came out better on the other side. Always largely felt the same as before, with a few frustrations removed…
However comparing 1 persons experience to another is futile and useless. We are all so different.
It’s always best to mention the part that will get people injured or killed first. 
Awful. It’s awful. Basically everything is loud, scary, threatening, but no one else seems to be experiencing the same reality as you. You’re alone and you know know know that you’re not going to get what you need to survive and nobody else seems to notice or care. All you have to go on is that you’re wrong about everything, the things you remember didn’t happen that way, the way you’re behaving is inappropriate, everything about you is exhausting and unlikable.
You’re magnetic and attractive and people are drawn to you and tell you easily and frequently that they love you, that there’s never been anyone else like you, that you’re magnificent, amazing. Sometimes you believe them, especially at first, but then it turns out that none of them really mean it. Sometimes they’re lying the whole time. Sometimes they just don’t see you very clearly and and then they see the rotten core and leave in horror/fear/sorrow/whatever. What it means is you’re not good enough and you never know why.
I don’t know how interested you are in etiology or in differences in brain function or that kind of thing. There’s a lot of overlap with complex ptsd.
Thanks rhubes…
You seem to have a personal understanding of this. I’m sorry if it’s something you struggle with.
Used to be. I no longer meet the diagnostic criteria, haven’t for a long time.
Thanks 
It’s very hard to have a relationship with someone with bpd. The problem is, they’re used to the floor falling out from beneath them with no warning, so it doesn’t matter how strong you build the house, they’re constantly prying up the boards to check for rot. It’s very similar to OCD, they keep testing the relationship to make sure it’s strong, because when they’ve let go and trusted before, they’ve ended up destroyed. Eventually even the most patient, devoted people get exhausted, just proving all over again that they can’t trust anyone.
yeah… sounds like a mess.
When speculating on the nature it does seem like something that people can grow out of. You become independent and self-supporting… real friends stick around and the bad ones fall off… life stabilizes… Just speculating though.
Yeah, I don’t know. It’s kind of like learning to walk on a broken leg that never healed right.
It’s frequently comorbid with depression and anxiety and substance abuse. Meds can help there. But growing out of it, in my experience, requires, idk. Brainwashing, almost. Reprogramming. It’s like stepping off a cliff on purpose.
The thing you gotta understand is that the bpd brain is very very different from the neurotypical brain. Threat and fight/flight responses are through the roof. The reward system is completely ■■■■■■ up.
So kind of think of it like - like learning to be calm in the middle of a burning house. Allowing yourself to be strapped down so someone can spin you around and throw knives around your body. Standing still while a tiger leaps at you, claws extended, and trusting that it won’t hurt you. Any human being can learn to do these things, in theory. But who is going to choose to?
I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder at first before another doctor changed my diagnosis. my official diagnosis was borderline personality disorder with psychotic nos. I didn’t fit the profile of a bpd person. Sure I was overly sensitive to negative emotions being projected at me. Still am as a matter of fact. I cry very easy.
Pdocs have suggested it, but it was never officially Dx’d.
Boy, did @Turnip hit the nail on the head for description as did Rhubot.[quote=“Turnip, post:4, topic:48020”]
my BPD issues get activated by interpersonal stress. This could be with family, or at work dealing with other staff, or even just trying to get a prescription filled at the pharmacy. I’m basically hypersensitive to invalidation and manipulation attempts, veerrry defensive, and I also have trust issues so bad it causes “splitting”. I suck at dealing with stress and dissociate easily or get cognitive dissonance problems. The unstable sense of self is a thing, and I have a history of self-harming behavior, too.
[/quote]
agree, agree.
This so fits.
So, so true.
I too, no longer meet the Dx criteria, nor haven’t for a long time.
I’ve learned to not go looking for trouble, because chances are, I’ll find it.
Sometimes it’s best to end the game and the relationship.
Wow, @Azley, thanks for asking about this. I’ve read the diagnostic criteria while trying to find out what’s wrong with one of my sisters. BPD fits her perfectly. @Turnip and @Rhubot I was so moved reading your accounts of what it feels like. My sister has wreaked havoc on our family with her manipulative, destructive, self-preserving/self-destructive behaviors. My other siblings and I have just about had it with her. Being four years younger, I was the victim of her abusive behavior growing up and she never owned the things she did or the things she does… She’s recently been reaching out to me and wonders why we don’t talk anymore. Anyway, just when I thought I was past compassion I read this thread and maybe I can stretch myself further and give her a call. BPD, though, is a nightmare for all involved.
Don’t force or even mention the diagnosis to her… Just use what you know to try and understand her better.
That sounded commanding… I’ve been warned though to not drop the bomb on this one.
Don’t give up on your sis man.
Be humble and strong and let her know you care. Keep your distance I guess. (I’m just now learning about all this)