Am I the only one who felt inferior?

[Ordinary]

I’ve been in my recovery from my first episode of psychosis for about 10 years now. From what I remember, when I first left hospital, and for the next six years, I was very fragile. My self-esteem and confidence were nonexistent, and my ability to cope with stressful situations was the lowest its ever been. I felt weak and inferior. I created this belief that everyone around me was somehow better, cooler, and more intelligent that myself. For most of my life I have felt lesser-than, but for a good stretch there, I could be crumpled, and sent into a depression that would leave me bed-ridden on occasion for 3 days at a time. One time, my friend said that they didn’t want to hang out with me, and I became so devastated that I lost 20 pounds in two weeks due to being malnourished and stressed out to a new extreme.

I’m working on my confidence as of now, using self-compassion and cognitive behavioral therapy to combat my core beliefs created in my turbulent childhood, and I’m making a whole ton of headway. I now know that it’s up to me to decide what kind of person I want to be, and that it’s not a crime to give myself a little love once and a while. I have stopped beating myself up, have forgiven all of my enemies from the past including myself, and no longer suffer from depression due to my prescription of Welbutrin. I will be starting college next week, even though I honestly thought I’d never be able to go to work or school because of anxiety.

I’ve always been peeved by people who act like they’re better than everyone, but, having confidence in your choices, and simply loving yourself doesn’t mean you are trying to be better than anyone. Mostly it means that you realize that you are the only one who is in control of how you choose to live your life. If anything, you’re the only person that you can rely on to make the changes necessary to live a good life.

I just wanted to share this story with the intention that some people might gain some hope from this.

What you practice you get good at. Whether it’s happiness, kindness, or cheat and deceit, whatever you do, you get good at after a while. I used to practice self-hatred, and in a world filled with constant negativity, I believed it to be normal. I then decided that that didn’t work, and that it wasn’t taking me down a path I wanted to go down, so, I started being nice to myself. I’m getting better at this everyday, and funny enough, the nicer I am to myself, the nicer I become to my friends and family.

I just have one question to ask you guys.

What are you practicing?

[far_cry0]

My self esteem is super low…!!! Have u tried excersizing and meditation…!!! I walk in the evening…!!! With my mom…!!!

Have therapy session with ur therapist if that could help u…???

I tried everything things barely helps me…!!! But i gotta positive…!!!

[Ordinary]

I’ve learned that there’s a difference between self-esteem, and self compassion.

Self esteem relies on your accomplishments to give you a sense of well-being.

While self-compassion is being able to be kind to yourself, no matter what. To forgive your past transgressions and to and give yourself the support only you can.

Here’s an example:

We usually say a lot of nice things about our friends and family, but when it comes to ourselves, we sometimes tend to say things that we wouldn’t say to our worst enemies.

If you were helping your child to learn to ride a bicycle, would you say “You’re a failure” or “Just give up” if they fell off the bike a few times?

Probably not.

You have to envision yourself as the parent and the child together.

When we learn new things or try new experiences, they are always hard at first, but in order to succeed at anything we need to accept ourselves and be patient.

[Katherine85]

No. You are not the only one. I always feel inferior than normal people. Schizophrenia makes me feel inferior.

[Ordinary]

There’s nothing wrong with having an illness that you have no control over. You didn’t choose your diagnosis, but you can damn well choose how you feel about it. Keep your chin up.

I’ve got schizoaffective disorder (Bipolar Type), but I never get down on myself anymore about it.

People will only warm up to the idea that mental illness is a normal thing if we first allow it to be.

Allow yourself to feel okay with who you are, and don’t worry about what you have.

Cheers.