I have tried a full time job and then now switch to half time. It is really difficult for me to hold a full time job. So I’m spending every afternoon alone. It’s too much time. Although I’m a small vessel, I feel not satisfied by my simple everyday life. The part I treasured most in my life is sleep time these days. Maybe it’s because of the extra free time I have got, I feel I don’t have words to say when I see my family. I just don’t have much ideas in my mind. I want to talk but I don’t have things to say. It’s all about daily living. I don’t like this part of my life.
I am getting us to the idea myself. Tried to go further my education and couldn’t handle. I’m a dishwasher and that’s what I’m looking at doing pt again. That’s going to be hard for me but I cant find a way around it. I just hope they don’t mess with my benefits cause I won’t make it without them.
Met a guy a really like but I think marriage is out. He makes to much money and I will lose my benefits. If I though there was an inkling of a chance that I could make it on my own I would take it.
Yes, small talk is hard for me, too.
When I want to make small talk with someone I know, I look at her to see if anything is different since least time I saw her. For example, most people are pleased if you notice their jewelry and ask about it. For example, “That’s a nice necklace. Was it a gift?”
Jayster