A Life Void of Sex

I was trying to masterbate as an adolescent in the state institution, but couldn’t get it up. I had been diagnosed a few months prior. That’s documented proof medicine stole that aspect of my being and saved another part. I have experience with a woman but in truth only one. I have lived my life without love and the comfort it brings. I am lonely today and don’t care to fix things. My Alter is frustrated. I am sza bi polar, DID, and drug addict. I’ve lived a life without sex. I looked better at one time. I have lived independent of family members since 2002. But it comes mighty close to unbearable at times. I need a buddy. A friend to teach guitar to and watch the stupid TV. That shouldn’t be hard to find.

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I’ve been divorced for a while now. I miss cuddling and holding hands and having the doors opened for me. I don’t want sex though. Would that be hard to find?

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I dont miss sex at all. A messy affair involving a woman or man, you have to serenade, messy bed sheets and the ensuing madness of “being in a relationship”.

Dont get me wrong - if the opportunity arises i will gladly accept. But frankly its easier to have a wank without the associated drama :stuck_out_tongue:

My heart has hardened over the years. Yes i get lonely and dip my toe in the pond of love now and again. But i dont go to bed crying about it at night.

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I dont think ill ever have sex again. Ive had my share of partners. 12 to be exact. But none ever lasted more than 2 years. No i dont go out and dont even want to date. Its much easier to just masterbate, although i do miss a good screw. I honestly dont really want to date anyone else.

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I agree, its fcked when the ability to orgasm is gone.

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I’m married and my husband and I have gone without for over nine years.

I’m Schizoaffective, he’s Bipolar.

We’re still deeply in love.

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How do you know? Are you aware of all of your alters thoughts and behaviors?

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My Alter is very vocal. There’s one I’m most aware of who is most vocal to me and his voice and appearance changes over time. He doesn’t know his place: he thinks he’s the boss. I have some that never talk to me I just happen to know about them. Some are but of the moment.

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That’s interesting @Jinx . Sorry you go through that

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I had sex last week and it was mediocre, okay to good. Sex doesn’t feel the same when you are self conscious not only dat but having sex in a van in the middle of a car park in a storm at night.

But at least I like him… Unlike in the past where I had sex out of paranoia.

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For me this is where my depression hits me the most. I was so good around girls before illness. Freaking confidence that I had. It was so easy to just approach and talk to girl. Now I struggle with normal conversations, I am so weird. What hurts the most is that lost, losing ability to seduce woman with your confidence. It is frustrating and it is the reason I am mostly suicidal. I worked so hard on myself to become strong, confident man and it is all taken away by illness. I hate this, I hate my sexless, lonely, miserable life. I dont know how to fix this problem, and if I dont fix it it is going to probably kill me.

I feel you on being lonely. I have no confidence left to talk to women. Jobless, live with my parents, mentally ill. Not exactly a good starting point for a relationship. But if we dont know how to deal with ourselves first. How can we expect to deal.with others? Put yourself first.

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Yeah I can’t masturbate any more. I like the freedom that gives me but it’s depressing to no longer have hope of having a relationship with a woman.

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Yeah we are in pretty same situation. I am jobless to and I live with my parents. But man I was jobless before and lived with my parents also , but I had confidence. From my experience you can be with 10 bucks in your wallet and still attract most woman. It is confidence that I lost that kills me the most.

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Same here, life is passing by, everyone is either getting married and having children, or having girlfriend, or hooking up with bunch of girls, and there is me 26y old, lonely, miserable, weird, sick guy, most of the time overly horny cuz of my bipolar, who cant even have normal regular conversation with human being. This illness hit me in most painful way and took something that I worked so hard to achieve. Fate is ■■■■■.

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Yes. I used to only have 10 bucks to my name and could get girls in my early to mid twenties. Since ive been medicated ive become kinda chubby, bald, and have no confidence. I guess reality has set in that im kind of a loser. I just do nothing all day.

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Reality of illness, even if you achieve something either you cant feel pleasure cuz of anhedonia, or depression is so hard that you cant get out of bad and do basic stuff like showering.

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I´m very self conscious… that´s the only reason I don´t have sex right now.

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Oh OK. Yea I can totally relate to that. I think it is quite common too.

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Its not all the time though. So days i feel accomplished. Its just about cherishing those good days. They may be rare but boy do i enjoy days i feel good.

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