I am starting to think that I might be bisexual. There are gay guys that I actually get that gut feeling around. I have only had sex with females, I’ve never even kissed a guy. But there was also a period when I was 16 when I was somewhat undecided about my sexuality, I considered myself bisexual back then but I hadnt even had my first kiss so what I thought didnt matter. Now I am getting impulses to ditch my female friend with benefits for a guy. I keep thinking about it. Like I am starting to plan it out. I got a single girls number last week but I havent even thought about contacting her even though she kept complementing me because I am more fixated on this one guy.
I get that gut feeling around metrosexual, rather feminine looking guys, not manly men. I go to a powerlifting/strongman competitor gym and Ive never felt any hint of attraction to manly looking men, I see them as equals. I myself am built and have a masculine face, strong chin and the masculine forehead and all of that. I masturbate to male on female pornography. I have to say ive been aroused by a male though. That happened. And I was seriously aroused specifically by one male, I didnt have a bone for some chick and then look at the dude.
Again, when I was 16 I was bi/undecided because I had never been intimate and felt attracted to girls and guys in my class, spent time with both but never got sexually involved. When I was 17 I decided on being perfectly straight and drastically changed my appearance, I started lifting every day, shaved by long hair and got two belts in Krav Maga and quit feeling attracted towards the boys in my class. I went from being 135 to 170 in a year. I think I had a testosterone wave, I got really sexually driven towards girls. I just got rejected a whole lot.
I really would appreciate some feedback, especially from bisexuals. Did you always know you were bisexual? Do you enjoy intimacy with one gender a little more than with the other? Do you go back and forth between straight and gay or do you constantly feel attracted to members of both sexes?
Growing up I considered myself straight. Would have been too ashamed to consider anything else with a very religious father.
Have gone through periods were sex/attraction to anyone was not at option or consideration. I just wasn’t interested.
Have been attracted to females and males at different times and in different situations.
Now I’m in a monogamous relationship with my husband but I can find both men and women attractive sexually.
Now I prefer to think that I’m attracted to people instead of gender. Some people attract me. Most don’t.
I would say don’t worry about defining yourself as one or the other but perhaps using bi would make you feel comfortable enough to explore both options freely.
This result can also be related to the Kinsey Scale:
0 = exclusively heterosexual 1 = predominantly heterosexual, incidentally homosexual 2 = predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual 3 = equally heterosexual and homosexual 4 = predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual 5 = predominantly homosexual, incidentally heterosexual 6 = exclusively homosexual
Summary
The idea of this exercise is to understand exactly how dynamic a person's sexual orientation can be, as well as how fluid it can be over a person's lifespan. While a person's number of actual homo/heterosexual encounters may be easy to categorise, their actual orientation may be completely different. Simple labels like "homosexual", "heterosexual", and "bisexual" need not be the only three options available to us.
So this test says, rouding 1.81 up to 2, that im “predominantly hetero, but more than incidentally homosexual”. I think that fits. Well it looks like Im not perfectly straight. Im not surprised. Guess I should ask the guy out.
I’m open to what happens in my life as far as relationships. I’ve fallen for lots of people both male and female. But life has only steered me to intimate relationships with females. The few guys I was interested in, things never came of it. For me, so many of my sudden “feelings of love” were drug or Sz induced. So eventually I just had to not let myself get off the hook about it.
If I ended up in a relationship with a man, I know my family will still love me, will still support me and will still be open minded. So nothing changes in my life.
I’m not going to get too upset about my sort of “self-identity” of what I think I am or not. If love comes… it comes. If it works, it works. I also think Firemonkey has a very excellent point.
I have fallen for a guy and felt nothing physically.
I’d say, don’t sweat it and don’t get worked up over a new feeling or idea. Sure ask the guy out.
As far as being “perfectly straight?” I don’t think a single person on earth is. That’s just now how the brain seems wired Sz or non-Sz. People can not strictly control the heart and tell the heart what to point at.
I might be straight, but I’m not narrow. Let it be.
personally i am straight always have been,but i have had many bi sexual and gay friends, my best man at my wedding was gay.
love/attraction is not to be analyzed, trust your feelings.
take care
p.s good topic
I am bisexual. I realized it when I was 13. I’ve always been a tomboy. I was with the boys in school, the girls were a bit frightened of me. I was in a lot of fights and beat the crap out of my antagonists. That was not a good thing because the guys saw me as one of them and the girls saw me as strange. Hard to get a girl or boyfriend in that situation. I got my first boyfriend when I was 17. Then I lived with a girl for 3 years before I met my husband.
The girl was a controlfreak. She wanted to control everything I did. It didn’t last. I need my freedom.
I’m bisexual, but I don’t know if I will be able to help because I never really feel much sexual attraction to people I don’t have feelings for and it seems you aren’t really a feelings person. But I am going to suggest that you go for it. I was completely surprised the first time I fell for another girl when I was off at school. But she was so different from the girls who lived in the area I was from. I guess this means I have a type?
Either way, what’s the harm? You can always put a stop to it if you change your mind.
I was bi as a teenager. I had a 2 year open relationship with a girl, and a friends with benefits relationship with a guy. It was a fun and free time in my life.
Eventually, my attraction to guys became stronger and I started a 4 year relationship with a guy. I’ve found that relationships with guys are easier for me. There’s less fuss and pretense.
I’ve never let myself be defined by who I was attracted to. I’ve always just gone with my gut. It works for me.
I say, if you’re attracted to this guy, then pursue it. Don’t be afraid of labels or judgements of others.
I’m bisexual but didn’t realize it until I was 18. The girl I was working with I became attracted to. I was very confused. Then in my early twenties I was drunk and made out with my friend at a party. Her and I ended up making out with another friend of ours. All we did was kiss. I experimented sexually in my twenties by having sex with the guy I was sleeping with and his friend who was a woman. Then I had a relationship with a woman right around the time I got diagnosed. She was more or less masculine which I was really attracted to, but I’ve also been attracted to feminine women. Sex with women is far better then sex with men, but sex with men turns me on more if that makes sense. At this point in my life I’d like to have a relationship with a man because I’d like to have children. I’d say go for it with the guy. You might find out you really like being with a guy. Good luck to you.
I am a “straight” man attracted to women physically, but I am not afraid to admire other men, and at times find myself attracted to certain men that posses feminine qualities about them, especially their appearance, but I am not bisexual, if this makes sense. I am also very pro gay rights. One of my good friends was lesbian. I am fond of what others would perceive to be feminine. I like butterflies for example
I am attracted to transgender people. I was so in love with a Thai “ladyboy” on holiday. She was so feminine. She just happened to have male genitalia.
I’m homosexual, I’ve been attracted to women for as long as i can remember. But i did have a relationship with a guy but all we did was kiss, i broke up with him after two months. I met my partner years before we got together. For years i was confused about my sexual preferences, i thought something was wrong with me. I didn’t tell my parents the truth about my relationship with my partner until about 3 years ago.
Not sure if this one is that scientific http://vistriai.com/gaytest/
but i scored 158 which suggested i was unlikely to be heterosexual and more likely to be bisexual/homosexual.
I have only ever had sex with one person and that was my wife. I think if you are severely mentally ill then this can sometimes spill over into how you see yourself in terms of gender and sexual preference . I think for some it can be a very fluid thing dependent on mental state such as delusionality /obsessiveness etc .
I did get close to guys when I was a teen, the cute and not manly kind, but we never got sexually involved. We were both intellectually stimulated by eachother and really stoned part of the time. I had this one friend who I was pretty open with. Our activities together were in reality rather romantic, we would spend the night at his house home alone and drink or smoke pot together and get into deep conversations. Neither of us ever mentioned physical intimacy, however. And he’s just one example. If I was as platonic with girls as I was with most of my guy friends, sex would have happened, no doubt at all. I was more emotionally attached to my friends in high school than girlfriends.
My platonic relationships with boys in high school were always stronger than ones with girls, other guys and I shared more about ourselves than we did with girls. Now we all have female partners in our lives, one is already married for example. He talked about having bisexual thoughts when we were hanging out last summer, right after he got married. I have a female friend with benefits right now. Everyone has a girl, basically, including me.
I had this one friend who would tease me about us seeming like a gay couple, we made a lot of goofy physical contact but we never kissed or anything…some kids thought we were actually partners. They were taken back when I told them we werent, they thought we were openly together. I think he knew I had some Bisexual tendency and sort of teased me about it, but he was there to give me advice when I starting dating girls. He even third wheeled one of my dates.
Don’t get me wrong, I am predominantly heterosexual, I fantasize and what not about females the vast majority of the time (but not 100%), but I do think I have always had a little bisexuality. It’s just Im finding myself with options and I find a guy more attractive than a female, both of them I feel like I have equal chances with and consider in my league. It’s the first time I’ve been faced with this scenario.
I did have gay and bi friends in high school. They never hit on me but they did flirt with me. I really politely made it clear that I just wanted to be friends. I’m good with communication, I had outstanding social skills before schizophrenia, and I am getting those skills back. I was the leader in social settings before I became a gym rat schizophrenic alcoholic hermit. Now I am pretty much fully recovered, my meds are awesome.
You spend a lot of time analyzing things so you can put a label on it to define it to others.
The amount of time you spend defining yourself on this site suggests your trying to convince yourself, not us.
Why not just let things happen if they do, and enjoy what you get from it?
You don’t owe anyone an explanation, and if your comfortable with your situation, that’s all that counts.
Others can be happy for you, or find something else to talk about.
