My Experience (Unique?)

DX'd - Sz/SzA
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I’m writing here to briefly describe my experience to see if anyone has had anything similar. I’ve never read of a similar experience so any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

It all started when I thought the people upstairs were talking about me smoking on the balcony. Soon those voices followed me to my job and spoke to me there. Soon i could also hear people in my office talking to me and to each other (even though they weren’t). Other voices also started to appear to be coming from the a/c units in my apt. And over a short period of time these voices became characters in a virtual, game-like world that overlapped the real one. My interactions became one of conflict, like battles where i was able to create objects or soldiers to fight against innumerable forces that would attack me. One example of a non fighting situation was where i created a team of specialists that would live in the lobby of my building, but could be called upon to remove bugs (listening devices) from my apartment put there by outside forces. It was a constant cat and mouse game. Also in this virtual/game world I had assassins come after me as well as ghosts and i could sense where they were along with other characters. I could not see them with my eyes open (except for one time with the ghosts thru a glass door) but i could see where they were in my mind and feel them if they were close.

At one point, some of the characters said i “beat the game” and would be let go from it. This was a relief as they had made me repeat many many times that “this is real”. However their attempt to kill me and therefore release me from the game was unsuccessful, and instead i ended up with god like powers. I would still be attacked, along with some friends i had made (who i defend to this day) but I became only limited my my imagination to create ways, objects, technology… ect to fight them with. This parallel world remains persistent and is one in which i live on a daily basis, in addition to the reality we all know.

As part of these powers i have, if i think something it usually happens which can be horrible, so most the time when I’m “logged into this world” i picture myself on the moon, as far away from anything i can destroy as possible.

Just to recap a few of the characters: Secret Ops communication guys, co-workers, neighbors, parents, Orbs, God, the Lucifer, ordinary people in large groups, people with special powers, Monsters (with portals to this world), assassins with laser guns, Ghosts (i would feel chills while walking over/thru them), Aliens (Zetas and Betas), Computers (that talk), police… just to name a few.

I’ve been on medication for over a year now which makes things easier, but this other world still remains. Has anyone come across an experience like this? Or would like to share some comments. Any feedback would be appreciated. I’m classified as schizoaffective as I have Bipolar 1 too.

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Yep. Same story different delusion. One time I ran around town taking heaven by storm - It was glorious. The city was golden and I was breaking down the gates for the good of all humanity. Needless to say all I did was annoy everyone around me. I too am bipolar sza.

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Anyone else care to weigh in? Yes or No, maybe describe your experience a little? thx

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Moved to DX’d - Sz/SzA per user request.

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Yes, social stress combined with stress more generally produce that type of thing in me.

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Just wanted to update my post with more detail/clarity and ask if you can share your experiences too.

I’m writing here to briefly describe my experience to see if anyone has had anything similar. I’ve
never read of a similar experience so any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

It all started when I thought the people upstairs were talking about me smoking on the balcony.
Soon those voices followed me to my job and spoke to me there. Soon i could also hear people in my office talking to me and to each other (even though they weren’t). Other voices also
started to appear to be coming from the a/c//heat units in my apt. And over a short period of time these voices became characters in a virtual, game-like world that overlapped the real
one. My interactions became one of conflict, like battles where i was able to create objects or soldiers to fight against innumerable forces that would attack me. One example of a non fighting situation was where i created a team of specialists that would live in the lobby of my
building, but could be called upon to remove bugs (listening devices) from my
apartment put there by outside forces. It was a constant cat and mouse game.
Also in this virtual/game world I had assassins come after me as well as
ghosts and i could sense where they were along with other characters. I could not see them with my eyes open (except for one time with the ghosts thru a glass door) but i could see where
they were in my mind and feel them if they were close.

Also to mention, one time I had a magic eye like affect looking into a computer
screen where I could see moving video of me traveling in a boat going down a
river in a jungle. Another visual hallucination i had appeared as a portal in the ceiling of my bedroom where i could control where i went, and where i went was a place with many crumbling
stone block buildings (i thought it was hell, though i saw no lava).

At one point, some of the characters said i “beat the game” and would be let go from it.
This was a relief as they had made me repeat many many times that “this is real”. However their
attempt to kill me and therefore release me from the game was unsuccessful, and
instead i ended up with unlimited powers. I would still be attacked, along with some friends i had made (who i defend to this day) but I became only limited my my imagination to create ways,
objects, technology… ect to fight them with. However, this power gives me limited ability to actually stop hearing voices. This parallel world remains persistent and is one in which i live on a daily basis, in addition to the reality we all know.

As a result of these powers, if i think about something it usually happens which can be very bad, so most the time when I’m “logged into this world” i picture myself on the moon, far away from anything i can destroy as possible.

Just to recap a few of the characters: Secret Ops communication guys, co-workers, neighbors, parents, Orbs, God, the Lucifer, ordinary people in large groups, people with special powers, Monsters (with portals to this world), assassins with laser guns, Ghosts (i would feel chills while walking over/thru them), Aliens (Zetas and Betas), Computers (that talk), police… just to name a
few. Also, the “world” contains heaven and hell, the earth, outer space and everything it contains. There’s even a way to die, go to hell, make your way to heaven, and come back to earth.

I’ve been on medication for over a year now which makes things easier, but this other world still remains. Has anyone come across an experience like this? Or would like to share some comments. The voices I’ve read about don’t appear to possess a place and are usually limited to a few. Any feedback would be appreciated. I’m classified as schizoaffective as I have
Bipolar 1 too. Also, please share your experiences too.

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Anyone else want to weigh in? Please :smiley:

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hey,

Yeah Thought insertion. Command hallucinations. Ideas of reference.

It’s all a similar thing and it feels so special but you need to know that plenty of other folk, roughly 1% of the population, who experience the same thing!

I just wrote off my experiences. It’s like being on acid…it’s all just brain chemistry and it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a brain firing wrong. It’s natural for your brain to search for meaning …but what if there is no meaning? What if it’s a disorder that affects the brain that causes loss of reality?

That is where it becomes problematic. Yeah we are all special but I remember thinking that all the birds had microtransmitters on them…that it was a grand conspiracy and the television was talking to me with special messages that cost millions to make…

Or I was ill. That is where I found myself.

It’s different but the same if you get my meaning!

A friend in the struggle,

Rogueone.

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Rogueone, in particular I’m interested to see if you had this virtual world in which everything takes place. Thx

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hey Moonwalker,

It’s a unique experience it really is.

Key is that some symptoms flow through and most psychiatrists who are any good see that.

I’m not saying it isn’t unique. I’m saying the root causes and brain chemistry is the same!

I can’t honestly comment on your experience. Mine was way different and even then I’d seen the Matrix…

It is what it is! The 1 %ers…welcome to the club…it isn’t all bad!

A friend in the struggle,

rogueone.

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I have to wonder if you guys play a lot of games on the computer?

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Thanks for acknowledging that this virtual world i have is really is unique. I understand that many of my symptoms are common including the paranoia, voices, searching for patterns that aren’t there, and i can identify with almost everything people say on this board regarding schizophrenia. Also my Dr also said he never heard of anything like it regarding this virtual world. But i still find it strange that its so rare, makes me wonder whats causing this difference in my experience. thanks for the feedback. If anyone also wants to confirm whether they have ever heard of anything like this i would appreciate that to, especially if its a “NO”.

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Can anyone else give feedback?

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Still looking for feedback looking. :eyes:

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I’m “old” in the Sz game, and still have never seen any of “the matrix” movies since they came out a little after my Dx, but what my pdoc said to me one time “Sounds like the Matrix” makes me think I experienced some of the same stuff so you.
It’s just harder for me to explain this because I’m not familiar with the gaming world.
I’ve “Sceen” these “Commando” guys outside my house numerous times, my fear holding me hostage for hours.
Portals to the other side in the living room, line of the dead spriraling around and down past the family room. Handshake to cross over or start over.
2 men in all black run past me and into my “Room” with the lights and music on, slam the door shut and lock me out, then run out the window, jump the fence and gone.
Guys with green foliage masks and paint hiding in the neighbors trees trying their darndest to appear a part of it, bu lack of proper sequence made it obvious to me.
I tried doing my best to communicate with them in a sort of sign language, but they’d just kinda scratch their heads and laugh, but I’d still try.
There’s been so many things it’s hard to explain, like the dancing strings from under the closet door, the blue “Finder” lights, the buzz sound that guaranteed sleep in minutes. The palm tree that waved at me-and moved around as if in a large pot with wheels- but the new neighbor denied it being anything but firmly in the ground, because he dug it up himself, not to HaPpy it took and entire day.
Ok, then there’s these two best friends (ch) &(ch) that were always in my sight giving me grief. They got to be such a problem that eventually I got them separated and put one on a one-way ticket to Maine USA, about as far as I could from here…must have worked, because he hasn’t returned.
Another was an bright white glowing orb that woke me up- I sat straight up in bed fully awake and stared as it told me “I’m ok now, I’m where I need to be” (plus a few more things, but I won’t say) and then it left. Later that morning my mom called and said her sister had died in a car accident last night, so I knew it had been her.
There’s the cold winds in the house pushing my office door open -with me having to sit against it to hold it closed, almost unsuccessfully, not once but twice. The folks in the long white coats in the family room I could barely make out because of looking through the door jam with two mirrors aligned just right.
The “movies” being made while looking in the reflection of two movie projector mirrors-front surface mirrors. Thought they were part of what had been recorded/played of other folks lives through those old projectors, kind of like they were reliving their lives through the mirrors.
it’s all part of the stuff people have been insisting it isn’t real, but I know otherwise.

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Wow thanks for responding. Some of that stuff is exactly like what happened to me, especially the commandos. At one point I had a sniper team with laser guns hunting me.

But let me ask you one thing to be clear, did you see this stuff with your eyes open or in your mind. Mine was all in my mind except for when I saw ghosts one time, that was eyes open thru a glass door.

Also did you get any powers to control stuff. I can think invent things and create them in the world. I can even summon commandos to fight for me or give voice commands to alter the universe, sometimes just thinking of something makes it happen. Like I can build stuff too

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Mostly with my eyes open, but at night when I closed my eyes, mainly once I went to bed trying to sleep, I could still see in the dark (like with a sort of night vision). I could navigate the house and outside just like daytime when I did get out of bed.

I really did at one time have the long guns laser dots on my forehead, right before they took me out of the building I was in. The other tenants later told my (ex) they couldn’t believe how many dots on my forehead-and I was still alive.
It had all been a misunderstanding between my pdoc and my ex.
But this was different that your talking about.
They liked to gather outside my house, and one time while at an apartment, on the roof, running rides hopping on cars in front of our windows trying to not be seen, but I guess my ex never told them that I had been logged in to his security cameras at his shop right up the street watching the whole ordeal unfold on may iPad.
…he wasn’t very nice to me, or others when he played games like that,which is why he is my “ex”.

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That sounds like it was real! I had my eyes open so that’s not different but you say you saw it with your normal vision? I could see later dots too on me but I know it was in my mind. Are we talking real or in mind with you?

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You mean with the long gun laser dots, most definitely real.
Best to say everything that happened outside and away from my home was indeed documented real.
The stuff that went on while I was inside my house all happened when I was up walking around wide awake, but I doubt I could prove anything because it takes too many years for the Joe blow public to know of such things.
Plus, what’s the point of trying to prove anything? When the time comes for others to know, then they will know, but it won’t be from me either way.
Sometimes it’s just best to sit back and observe the odd things, not fight too much, and as my “voices” chant repeatedly, "Play the game, and it won’t hurt."
I fought back in anger before, but it gets me nowhere fast.
If the “Game” is real, it just maybe in the best interest of all, especially yourself to do the best you are able to everyday, and let the game continue.
I have to constantly remind myself that I am NOT the game, all players can be replaced, and the game continues with or without me, so I might as well be a part of everything even if I don’t understand it.
I’m resolved to remain in the game and stop fighting myself, because they can take me out at any time they like, and no one will be the wiser.

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Hey. I have a similar power. I can create barriers and mute outside forces/stimuli, which can get in the way with everyday life… For example… I won’t hear the phone ringing, I can’t hear anyone calling my name from downstairs, and/or I won’t know what time of day it is because I’m incredibly sensitive to lights… So I create barriers. They aren’t like wooden planks, it’s more of an outer space looking poster or something. I can’t really explain how it looks. Anyway. When I first experienced psychosis, I only remember vague details. Anyway, It was about noon. I had went out for my daily hike in the trails behind the city park. I began on a different trail this time, as I was curious to where it lead to. I ventured for about ten minutes of walking and sat down to check my phone and what not. I heard someone’s voice come from where I was coming from. It spooked me for a moment, but I relaxed and answered. The voice responded back, and by now, I was having a conversation with nobody. I knew it was nobody, because I ran towards the supposed person, and… Nobody was there. I checked my phone to see if I pocket dialed someone by accident, an I didn’t. At this point, I felt really stupid. So now I’m in no mood to do anything at all. So I started walking out of the trails and went home. But on the way home, the radio was very loud. I tried turning it down, but no matter what volume I put it on, it sounded like 40. I got home and went to my room and closed both of my doors, because that’s what I normally do to tell my guardian that Im in a bad mood. I lie down and try to relax. (Did I say vague details…? Hahaha oops.)
I stared at the wall for way too long. The walls started melting… (To this day, they’re lava. Which I can live with because I’ve touched them and nothing happens.) So I shut my eyes for a minute and look again. The furniture is on fire, the ceiling fan is flinging ashes everywhere, and Im out the door. I ran downstairs and out the front door. I call the fire department because now the place is burning to the ground. I’m panicking, I’m crying, and I am pacing far away from the danger zone. The firefighters get here in about 12 minutes… I counted. They show up and aren’t very on edge. However, they have everyone evacuate their homes because everyone’s condos are connected. I’m hyperventilating now because I hate being seen in public while Im breaking down. A few minutes go by, and the firefighters come back out and start asking me way too many questions. They suspect that Im abusing drugs or using illegal drugs. They call the police (I’m fucking terrified of police. Because they have weapons.) and they show up in no time because I’m apparently dangerous. They show up and question me about my personal information. Apparently I said it was 1973. (Why?) But after they question me, I’m forced into the back of a cruiser. I’m livid by this time. I’m screaming random sentences, I’m making odd noises, and I’m cursing. Well, we get to the station and go through what they had to do. At this time, I had no clue what was going on. It’s like I forgot what had just happended. Anyway, the police were making funny faces and saying some weird things, off an on. So I was laughing during a serious situation. I’m then drug tested and I come clean. They call in paramedics to evaluate me, and suspect that Im going through psychosis. I’m then sent to my first psychiatric hospital. I’m sent home two weeks later, with the diagnosis of schizotypical disorder… Or something like that. I really don’t remember. So, there’s my first experience. Hope it helps! My fingers hurt.

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