I leave the doctor’s office after having an appointment with case worker and I start panicking. I call up my case worker and tell her I want to be admitted to a hospital because I am having paranoia and hallucinations. It has been this way for a month and yesterday I was tired of it. I go to the the emergency room and get the usual urine and blood tests (comes back normal). So a doctor comes in and says a psychologist is coming. Ok. Good so far. After he gets done talking to my parents he gives me a competency test (for disorganized thoughts and memory) and I pass every question. He then suggests I not be admitted to a hospital and I come home. They schedule an appointment (for today) and the end up just increasing a med.
I feel bad, like i wasted everyone’s time like an idiot. Maybe I should just laugh it off? Thoughts?
Expect them to continue to treat you like that in the future. Their main goal is to stabilize you and their main tool of doing so is using meds or increasing them. The fact that you were enough in the real World to answer those questions correctly meant the drug was helping and not completely failing in their minds because if you didn’t answer them correctly you’d be too out of it to function. Getting completely rid of the paranoia and hallucinations is not necessarily a goal of theirs either. Some of us don’t completely lose that as a result of the meds ever. If the meds haven’t completely rid of your positive hallucinations after a few years then it will always be that way. You didn’t waste their time because you made their jobs still relevant. They learned more about you and they still have something to do like raise your meds. By the way if you incorrectly answered those questions they would have doped you up worse and kept you in a Psych Ward for a while.