My 14 year old stepdaughter has a 19 year old boyfriend. Her mom and dad agreed to let them talk as long as they’re chaperoned the whole time. She wants to get him a Christmas present but doesn’t have a job yet so I’d have to pay for it with my savings. Would you let her buy him a present?
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Maybe she could get a small gift like $10 or $20 if that would be able to fit your budget. Or maybe she could cook him supper and bake some cookies or cupcakes.
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True. I think she could give him something cheap. I’m just really uncomfortable with the relationship
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Sweet Baby Jesus. 14/19? I’d buy the parents some nootropics, their brains obviously aren’t working.
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Isn’t this the pot smoker hoodlum? Also 5 years at that age is huge. Predatory in my eyes.
I wouldn’t let my child have anything to do with him, none the less shower him with gifts.
I’m sorry, but this isn’t right, I can’t condone this type of relationship. She’s a child, and if this continues, he will probably statutory rape her, If he hasn’t already.
If you have to, buy him a pot pipe and some condoms. God knows he’ll need em unless you want a pregnancy on your hands
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Yeah, 19 year old man dating a 14 year old?
Nope to the presents either.
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No don’t get the present. Don’t facilitate that relationship at all
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I agree @anon82948922. But I’m just a step parent. It’s not for me to say.
@Ooorgle yes he smokes pot. It makes me nervous that they let her be with him even though it’s chaperoned.
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That’s what I’m thinking @Csummers
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It’s decided @spiderpig. The present is not coming from me.
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So what, they chaperone until one of them gets bored, or in trouble? Until she’s legal age? Until she figures out she can get away with this kind of manipulation in other ways, in getting you all to think this is ok in the first place.
I’m sorry I’m being harsh, But I see the parents as the guilty ones here, she’s a child being manipulated by and older man, and they are culpable in whatever ill comes because they won’t step in and put a stop to unhealthy, potentially Illegal activity.
That’s the kind of things children get taken away for, and a Judge might consider it abuse.
Is pot even legal in your area? Are they drug testing her? He’s doing more than just pot, and the parents risk him giving it to her, another crime
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They haven’t been alone with each other yet. I don’t know if he does more than pot. Pot is legal where I live. I hope they get sick of each other and it ends soon.
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My apologies if I was rude. You don’t warrant it. My fire is misplaced. I’m bringing some of my own history into my judgment here.
I’m wishing the best for you and your tribe.
I pray my fears are unfounded and continue to be so.
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Thanks @Ooorgle. I understand why you’re upset. I am too. At least I know that if she goes to a friends house, her dad makes sure the parents will be home, and that if she wants to see him it’s only when he’s home and they’re supervised the whole time. As long as my husband stays vigilant, no harm should happen. But that’s only if he stays vigilant. If he doesn’t I’ll voice my concerns again.
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I believe it’s legal for anyone to report endangerment of a minor to child services.
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He hasn’t touched her because they’ve been supervised at all times. If he does, I’ll report him
When my daughter was 15 she started seeing an 18 year old. My ex husband made a huge deal which just made her push away from her dad. I just allowed them hanging out at my place and out with groups of friends. I knew it would be short lived but I made myself available to listen. One day she came home crying because he had been dating a girl older than her. I was so glad it was done but I still cried with her. A broken heart needs lots of reassurance and love.
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So true @FatMama. We don’t want her sneaking around to see him which is why her dad is letting him come over and be supervised. We don’t want her to rebel and for the boyfriend to become that much more desirable. I don’t think it’ll last and hopefully they tire of each other soon.
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How did they meet if they are always supervised? I hope she turns to someone closer in age soon.