Ok, am not doing well now, but this is another story…
So I went sick at an early age… I guess my family was engaged to save themselves from my father who was beating my mom and my sister… But at one point, I turned to not care, I became cold, I kept everything in me and I was just going downhill… I couldn’t help, I couldn’t be there… My sister confirmed that I was cold … I even turned a bit of a psycho with my anger and my irritability… I carry them in fact since decades, this is the truth…
But for some other things, I lack emotions I find… I am not emotionless even now, but I couldn’t act for decades so I looked cold… Plus now if I have emotions, they can be all over, not calm, deep thing… But anyway… I try to pardon myself for some things, but its what happened to me…
I knew some szs in my life and they didn’t look like me… They all had deep and warm feelings lol… But my fate was to know the domestic violence, maybe the negligence and a bunch of other stuff… My sister is fine, but she is mad at my mom and me a bit… But I was a kid too. A kid who couldn’t even talk or share, never hugged by his father or hearing things like that she’s pretty etc… I guess I needed help too…
Anyway, I don’t complain now… We’ve all been hurted in this family… Currently I am overexcited, I cant calm here after picking my skin of the face again, but I still want to live.
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