■■■■! I think I’m schizophrenic!
Do you know if delusions of persecution is common with bipolar @LevelJ1?
Seems like it would be more common with schizophrenia or schizoaffective.
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Its a good question. I definitely blur that line between bipolar 1 and schizoaffective.
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i hallucinated shadow agents torturing my auntie and tapping into my mind to torment me as they killed each loved one one by one and sending me psychic livestreams of their torture and murders. naturally, i did not want auntie to die so i called the police to do a check lol. they were like auntie is fine plz come outside to the ambulance and i was like ok just a minute consulted the voices can we do this monday? i have an exam tomorrow. cop: no. me: ok how about saturday? cop: no. me: five hours from now? cop:
that is the story of how i ended up in the back of a squad car and then in full restraints in the ambulance. apparently, verbal objections to 5150’s are treated with restraints, too.
i hate restraints so much.
they always use restraints on me since then, even tho ive never objected to hospitalization after that thinking maybe they wouldnt restrain me if i went voluntarily. nope. restraints always.
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Yeah me too but I’m pretty sure that I belong in the schizoaffective camp.
I don’t think that I was cycling during my last psychotic break 5 years ago.
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I truly believed that the police had stationed the two voices in my headby satellite to harass me, driving me to Suicide. Everyone was in on it, the woman at the diner, the guy who fix my furnace, my family… Everybody was out to screw me somehow and it was one huge practical joke, everyone was in on it, and just wasn’t funny
They sent me to a psych, but I was convinced he was working with the police to kill me. I popped off screaming at people a couple of times, it was all so overwhelming
Let me tell you a secret.
In the initial phases of my schizophrenia, I had a feeling that my parents support me, but almost all
other people oppose me and want me to fail.
In hindsight, I feel that the feeling was correct, and moreover even now this situation still holds true.
That said, I should clarify that I have made enormous progress despite society’s hostility.
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In 10th grade I believed that I was a demigod who had control of the weather. I thought that there was a secret government agency created to track me and harness my powers. I thought they killed my whole family and replaced them all with imposters. I threatened one of my classmates because I thought he was working with the agency and that’s when they called the police on me. I was brought to the hospital in handcuffs.
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My first psychotic symptom was in highschool and I thought everyone was talking about me, and everything centered on me. That resolved itself in a few weeks and nobody really noticed because I was completely introverted. Fast forward to university and I had my first ‘mental breakdown’ and had a very public arrest by the police where a crowd of no less than 150 people watched as I was taken away. What I was thinking then is just ‘word salad’.
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Im not sure how much it matters. The treatments pretty similar. Ap and mood stabilizer if needed.
After my first big break i had more psychosis episodes without mood issues. But now im dealing with more mood issues and less psychosis. It just seems to change over the years.
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Mines the opposite.
In my early years I suffered with more mood cycles.
Today when I become destabilized its more psychosis.
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I was in the group home about four months and then I had this incredible violent feeling. I was really scared I was going to hurt someone or run amok downtown. I fought off the feeling and it only lasted a couple weeks. Never felt an urge that strong again and that was like 40 years ago.
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I thought that my family wanted to kill me too
I thought people were watching me via tiny cameras placed around my home. I thought people were following me in their cars. I thought someone tried to poison me at work. I thought certain people weren’t human, they were aliens. I thought people could read my mind.
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Similar was my story as well,
I was doing my masters and had to drop out of college due to plotting and harming me.
Why does every ones issues sounds the same?
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