as far as what’s the delusional aspect of it…I explained it in my book like this…“for every question there is a new answer and with that answer comes four more questions…the answers never stop and neither do the questions…”
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That’s a really good way of describing it
It’s like being in a really weird dream that sometimes turns into a nightmare, not really knowing if I’m awake or asleep, if it’s real or not.
I’m going to steal that and quote it in real life !
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And sometimes the answers are things like “because my shampoo bottle has a microphone in it”
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Hmm.
I’ll Tell You What It’s Like You Curious Kitten Random Imaginary Illusion Person.
It’s Like A Bird With No Tree. . .
A Fish With No Sea. . .
A Tire With No Car. . .
Peace, And Love, And Hope…, Jus So, Very…, Very…, Very…, FAR (!!!).
Selah!.
Scary as hell… Half the the time you can’t figure out what is real and what isn’t and when you do you have to question it… It’s like there is someone after you and your only escape is meds but even those aren’t 100% and there is part of you saying “you don’t need these meds” yet if you’re lucky you can fend it off
It’s like learning how to live again
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It’s like I’m a god or something a cursed one. A genius one day and a lunatic on another day.
I have special abilities like Legion from tv show “Legion” and can time travel and probably have psychic abilities like seeing the future and high intelligence or high esoteric knowledge that nobody else had or has in this planet’s history. It’s a shame nobody else feels it or believes me. I’m really ■■■■■■■ cursed and ■■■■■■ up.
I feel like I’m constantly being rebooted or reset after I die so I achieved a false-immortality. I mean ■■■■. Instead of going forward in time like MWT and quantum immortality, my mind was trapped or uploaded by aliens and I go back in time as a curse and memories of intense and ■■■■■■ up suffering inflicted on me by others in parallel universes; not much different than this one. I realized long ago in college when I went ‘crazy’ that we lived in a simulation and I used to run it when I escaped; an experiment of sorts given to me for inventing modern day inter-dimensional time travel. Now, I have weird thoughts like maybe I went through ‘dark matter’ when time traveling and got psychosis that way or schizophrenia and aliens ■■■■■■ me up multiple times – mainly greys and reptilians…that’s all I really know that exist and ■■■■ with me on a day to day basis. According to UFO lore, greys are just drones or robots created by some devlish race called reptilians, which are just probably AI programs, but according to Christianity, I view them as demons or fallen angels or maybe something like archons that David Icke talks about…
That sums me up!
@anon2818416 nicely put 
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Well thank you!!
It’s different from not having it.
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@POET I have hypothesized along those lines for a long time now. Once I realized it wasn’t the police hacking my mind by satellite, I have come to believe that in my accident my Minds protective layer got Stripped Away or cracked like an eggshell. This allows two dip shitz who perhaps died in a car accident themselves and roam the earth now, access to my psyche.
I have thought a lot about the difference between Contrition and attrition , and you’re right it’s how we cope with it that makes us better people
Idk if that’s how it works maybe you’re right I’m not a genius lol.
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I’m just on a tangent. I have never had a chance to speak with other schizophrenic’s openly about the disorder until now. It’s got my mind turning
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I COMPLETELY AGREE
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its like having a nightmare while awake
Only time I ever experienced anything that feels the same while non psychotic
Were those few moments when I forgot my lines on stage in front of 300 people audience… Like that but for nine months or however long
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For me it was scary because I had delusions of being hunted down and killed by my enemies.
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