Before I got diagnosed I knew something was wrong with me but I assumed it was manic depression, did anybody else think there was something wrong with them before diagnosis? If so what?
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Bipolar here too.
I thought as I started hearing voices that either I was losing my mind or that God was talking to me, and of course being as rational as i was I decided it was God talking to me. I thought if people found out I was hearing voices I would be locked up for life so I almost completely stopped talking to people and kept it a secret for a long time.
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Uhhh most of my life I had no insight into me having psychosis at all. I was even a psychology nerd who was interested in mental illness and often read about it but still somehow did not put two and two together until a friend later confronted me about it.
I knew I struggled with depression. That’s really it though. Then after I gained insight I knew I must have some kind of psychosis but really didn’t think it was schizophrenia because I didn’t fit the textbook example of it. But I didn’t really fit the textbook example for any psychotic disorder. I didn’t know I had issues w anxiety until my school psychologist told me my senior year of hs. I started suspecting I had narcolepsy I think sophomore year of college after 4 years of getting sleep attacks and other related symptoms after I started googling my symptoms. I never thought I had narcolepsy before that because I thought narcolepsy was like the guy in moulin rouge where he would just randomly collapse and be asleep but nope. I think I started suspecting I had ptsd around freshmen year of college but was too ashamed to fully accept that until later.
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I didn’t speculate what I had, but bought a book on psychology about 6-12 months before my first psych appointment.
People would tell me I was bipolar but then I’d sound like a bipolar person getting so angry with them bc I knew that to be false. For a couple years in the prodromal period I was severely depressed but I think that was bc I had a benzo dependence at the time.
I had no insight. I thought the world was just getting weirder and I was completely ok.
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Aspergers, dp/Dr, hypomania, depression, and schizophrenia.
I thought I had adhd cause that’s what everyone thought at the time.
Before my psychosis started, I was just bipolar. Once it started, I felt I was SZA bipolar type. After months and months of psychosis, I was Dx’d with SZA bipolar type.
One of my first diagnosis was bipolar.
I was diagnosed with it for years before I came to the realization that more was going on.
I later was properly diagnosed with Schizoaffective.
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I just assumed it was all part of my PTSD.
I am sza. I thought I had depression recurrent and severe because that’s what I was diagnosed with. Before I was diagnosed with the recurrent depression, I thought I had sz because I was so paranoid and delusional. Some pdocs can’t sense their noses in front of their faces.
Me, too. I thought I just had severe PTSD. Turns out I have major delusions based off of my trauma.
i had social axiety
I thought I had DID because of the voices having different names and sexes
When I was young I thought I was different from everyone else on the planet. Like I was either an alien or some sort of goddess who lost her powers. I felt very disconnected from humans and was pretty much a sociopath from age 9-14
When I was 15 and started having very bad manic episodes, I thought I must have bipolar. (Don’t get manic really anymore, seems like something I grew out of which is weird)
A few years ago I found out I had aspergers, and that was definitely a ‘OHH, THAT MAKES SENSE’ moment. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child but didn’t relate to the diagnoses. It felt good knowing after years of meltdowns and bad social interaction and sensory issues that I wasn’t a freak, just on the autism spectrum.
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I remember many years ago asking on an online forum what the hell was up with me, I said, I’m definitely not mentally ill BUT… then describing classic symptoms of mood disorder and psychosis. I knew something was wrong but was totally in denial to the possibility of mental illness. I just thought I was stressed!
Bipolar but I was after all half right. I guess me telling the crisis counselor I was dead raised a few flags though it just felt like another day to me.
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I was a weirdo child .
I had some hopelessness and overwhelmed apathy in some of my childhood aswell as other things and my spirit was not in my body and trying to just survive.
I had some happy moments too but I was not coping and should not have gone to school.