Good news: Haven’t had any attacks in a couple of days! Thinking maybe this episode is winding down??
Weird news: Haven’t really felt properly in my body all day today again. It’s the weirdest sensation and I can’t really describe it. My ex-therapist and other people have called it dissociation. Has anyone else experienced it? I started experiencing it on a regular basis since around senior year of hs. It’s not unpleasant really, just very strange. Sometimes I feel like I’m all around my body, sometimes I feel like I’m everything and I’m just stringing my body along like a puppet. Wonder what’s behind that sensation.
When i was off meds i oftenly had a feeling like im watching my body from within my body. Like my hands and legs are indenpedently moving.It was weird because i felt so alienated from my own parts. And the rest of the world looked like its covered with cellophane.
In my case it was the highest point of stress and anxiety.
For the past year or so… this has been happening to me more and more.
I feel floaty and out of body… like I’m seeing myself from outside myself. It happens a lot during an anxiety attack for me. Sort of I pop out of my body to avoid crumbling during a stress hit.
Depersonalization or disassociation… I’m tempted to get a sign to have… out of body… be back in 5 minutes.
I see myself doing some silly things… and can’t stop myself. Sometimes it’s just puzzling… other times… I don’t feel in control of myself… and I freeze or space out… I don’t like it.
WOW. I was watching Don Jon (movie) and the main guy was complaining over how sex wasn’t as good as porn. I got angry and thought “Idiots! It’s the devil feeding you lies! Don’t they know??” And as I felt this anger and thought this I SNAPPED back in my body, again I don’t really have words but I just knew I was “back” again. It all feels normal again…mostly. How strange.
Earlier when I was talking to my friend I was so out of it the room was enveloped in light and she was fading into it. Everything was just blurring together. And now I’m back and everything seems much more solid.