Wasted In Recovery

Started drinking bottles of Vodka in the past month or so Stuffing up my recovery of schizophrenia Sober 3 days today and I feel a lot better for it It’s just that pesky demon of the booze sits on my shoulder ear bashes my nerves and begs for a drink I tried to get away for a week with a mate all paid for through mental health respite I lasted one night and had to come home to my comfort zone I got really bad anxiety and was too scared to leave the cabin in case people talked about me laughed at me or any harassment of any sort I got really stressed So I got the ■■■■ out of there I’ve been prescribed Seroquel to go along with my injection and I’m seeing my regular alcohol counsellor soon Who encourages my painting exploring music and trying to learn things I did so well after getting sober at the end of 2011 until the end of 2012 then I’ve been on and off it since then Started to revisit those dark places at 2Am again I’m a born fearer though lol anyway hopefully I can weather the storm and as I said before 3 days sober and Suzie Q sleep aid I’m feeling better already. Anyone on here with schizophrenia struggle with booze or drugs ?

I struggle with booze. When I’m hung over I tell myself I am going to leave it alone for good. They say that alcohol is a depressant, so it makes depression worse if you’re depressed. I hate that sour feeling in my stomach and the depressed way I feel after a hard drunk. I have some kind of inexplicable craving for it, though. When I think back on all the trouble alcohol has gotten me into I think I’m crazy for not quitting. At least I don’t have a car, so I can’t drink and drive.


I used to like getting drunk. I also used to like smoking crack. But it became a problem with me when I became addicted to the crack. I smoked it heavily for about 3 1/2 years. But I quit all drugs in 1990 with the help of AA, CA, and NA. I don’t miss drugs or alcohol at all.

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I used to… Six years sober and XTC / amphetamine free. If I’m honest… had a relapse with pot over a year and a half ago. Just a little… I thought. I’ve been doing so well… what could just one little bit do…

almost kill all the hard work and amp up almost all my paranoia and other symptoms and land me in hospital… I have NO idea how I didn’t loose my job.

I got started when I was pretty young when I started drinking and taking drugs. At the time… it wasn’t to party or be cool… it was self medicating what was going wrong in my mind, but not diagnosed yet.

I got put through detox and rehab a few times… I’ve also been in AA. It helped me for long while.

But it sounds like your starting a good track… you have painting and music. You have a counselor that your seeing, Congratulations on putting the bottle down. I hope tomorrow is easier then today… I hope today is easier then yesterday.

It really is one day at a time. I’m rooting for you.

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Does anyone here struggle with booze or drugs? Check both. They have me on xanax three times a day, I am addicted to it, I also drink socially. I hate life sometimes and just want my ■■■■■■■ xanax and a few beers with it and then go to sleep. The thing is that I function very highly and it gets a blind eye turned on it by my doctors, they just say “at least you arent getting shitfaced” in so many words.

I went to AA, couldnt identify with them, they drank too much, I just drink a few beers (which feels like more since Im on xanax) and my life is still in order.

I tried cutting back on the xanax, went crazy, ■■■■ that.

I might be very highly functioning but I have some unsavory issues.

I used to straight up abuse preworkout stimulants. I would take twice the maximum dose. I quit doing that, I just take the maximum dose these days.

I smoke a pack a day.

I used to smoke pot every night when I was 18 for about six months.

Im having a bad day so far.

Don’t be like me, just quit drinking and make friends who dont drink. Sooner or later every drinker gets a DUI or belligerent and in a cop car or in some other sort of serious trouble. The problem is that I am 21, all my friends drink, I and have issues and it’s like medicine for me, it helps the symptoms and makes me feel less pain. Alcohol and xanax does my brain as much good as sex.

But in the meantime I just do whatever and function too highly for anyone to call me out on it.

Again, dont be like me, stay clean and make a new life. I began my adventures in substances when I was 18 and in the prodromal phase, soon enough I was a different person and my life was messed up. Im a different person today but I am in pain and I generally dislike my life. I’m studying clinical psychology and also slowly but steadily my illness is getting worse, its such a fun life, oh it’s just great. I learn about all of this psychological stuff and most of it just makes me realize how sick and disturbed I am. My therapist literally tells me that I am ■■■■■■ up.

Don’t be ■■■■■■ up.

That’s a little secret about the almighty mouse- he drinks and smokes and takes a narcotic three times a day. Oh and he’s on a full scholarship to university studying psychology, going to write his thesis on psychotherapy next year, and is remarkably muscular and looks just fine.

Huh. Looks fine, isn’t really.

Don’t be like me, I hate myself.


ive been through it im out the other side its so much better less chaotic even boring sometimes but I [prefer boredom to insane chaos.
I think alcohol councelling is awesome I had it it really helped me. its very much helped me to sit with the feeling I want a drink now but not take action.
I used to be very impulsive id have the thought then id be down the shop goodluck to you.

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Yeah it’s tough It’s weird because I had a pretty good upbringing but for some reason I would go home from school at lunch and drink 2 or 3 beers & a couple of shots of cooking brandy at the age of 13 then go back to school Which led to pot at 14 & XTC, Speed & LSD at 15 I’m now 27 and I’m at a crossroads

I hope u quit one day I sometimes think there should have been more education against drug & alcohol use as a kid but them again as teen I was anti education Lol Not these days though I try and learn as much as possible One thing u mentioned about alcohol is u said its a depressant I’ve heard this too and defiently is for me I’ve also heard its Neurotoxic or not good for the brain This is one of the main reasons plus money that I wanna give up I’m really into learning these days wheather it’s mental health, History, Arts or writing This might sound stupid but every time I have a drinking session the next day I feel dumber or like there’s a fog around me making it unable to think clearly Now I know all this stuff but just struggle to put the bottle down anyway thanks everyone for sharing I’m now 4 days sober and enjoying it.

AA, CA, and NA, changed my life for the better besides just abstaining from drinking and drugging. Two months after I got clean in 1990 I was living in a Board & Care home. I was 30 years old. I had gotten a part-time job and did EVERYTHING it took to enroll in community college. I ended up staying at the job for three years and I took two classes per semester at the college for 5 years. I started going to 5 or 6 AA meetings a week. I made a good friend in the home and we used to do stuff like go to movies, AA events, concerts, etc. I was also taking the bus for 1 1/2 hours to visit family and do fun stuff. I believe AA, CA, and NA, gets a lot of the credit for me to do ANY of these things. I know for a fact that I would never gone to college if I was on drugs. It’s even a laughable premise! The way I did crack there was no way I could stay at a job for three years. My “friends” during my drug days used me and I used them because of drugs. We cheated and lied to each other. Not the best of friends. I ended up knowing my friend from the group home for seven years. He never cheated me or stabbed me in the back like my using friends. Yeah, getting clean opened up a whole new world for me. It’s possible to have fun without booze or drugs.

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You sound like a tortured soul, Mortimer.

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i struggle with alcohol and abuse of other things. all escape tactics.
i dont social drink i only drink to get wasted. i have been trying to stop for years


I think I am a tortured soul, you’re right. Lol

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I try not to but occasionally on a weekend I’ll be upset and end up doing that. Not good I know