Yeah. Actually most of the time, in the rare occasions I get an inkling or a thought that seems from an outside source it is accurate. It’s not a command either. It’s a “well maybe” kind of thing. Even when it’s usually accurate, I never take it as so. You can’t depend on something like that. I don’t use this ability all the time, or try to, it can become overwhelming. Sometimes a veil around reality is more comfortable, but when you are in danger and it prevents a death or an illness then it’s different. I have tons of examples. I have premotions too.
I’ve been off my medication for three weeks and I’m getting more in touch with it. I don’t know why it’s more present when I’m off my meds completely. I think it is that I have more of an unfiltered clarity so it works better. I’m more sensitive though, like sounds and sights are more vivid and I keep working toward adapting and coping with surroundings. My memory has improved. Abilify for certain impairs my memory in a way because I’ve been on a daily high dosage of it.
Here are examples of my so called thoughts or voices: i spent the night at a friends house and I was falling asleep and I heard–not really heard but thought-- you really shouldn’t stay. I asked it or myself, why but it couldn’t say because that would be too much to process. I mean psychic information is hard to process. I had no idea why. The next day I drove someone to VA and got lost, had no cellphone or GPS and almost got in car accident. The voice didn’t want me to do it.
So this is the issue. A psychic girl told me after I got a reading that her phone randomly looked up New York City, this happened about two and a half years ago. I thought, NYC, I’ll never go there. I asked the girl if there was a place I was fated to or most likely to die in and should avoid. Two years later my new friend is obsessed with NYC and we go there and I ran out of money. I made it home alive. Now he’s inviting me to move to NYC with him.
This is where it is difficult. I want so badly to leave and move to NYC, get my life together and get a good career.
My ex boyfriend and another friend had the same dream about being together in a car and driving off a cliff, then he wakes up in the hospital with a wristband that has the date : 6/24/2014. That’s the birthday of my friend who wants to take me to NYC. I had a dream also that my bf got his pants pulled down in front of me by a bitchy girl and the next day she did that to me in front of everyone. It was weird.
I think my ex is my soulmate but he’s been hurtful and everyone said he was using me.
So that’s why being psychic is hard. You can’t do everything and be reckless. you can’t be ignorant and you can’t pretend they didn’t warn you when the situations worsen.
A good portion of my so called disorder has something to do with being psychic but I don’t tell people that much because it’s not exactly believed.
My ex boyfriend was probably the subject of my dream I had in the mental hospital when I was 17. it was about a man whose blood cell count was so low it was life threatening and the doctors decided not to disclose that it was killing him. My ex is on clozapine, he showed me the paper that’s like in the dream from about 8 years ago of his low white blood cell count.
So despite that I want more than anything to move to new york city I cant. Also seems to be that the person who is “moving away” is the one that the astrology forecast said to be wary of “someone is trying to cozy up to you but is proving to be starting ■■■■ or betraying you”…so on the surface things are a lot different than beneath it.
That is why reality is so amazing.
These so called voices do not happen constantly, and typically interrupt me with a warning or suggestion. I’ve had this issue since I was about 13 or 14. I have NEVER EVER had a voice say kill your parents or anything. In my darkest moments on Geodon I had command hallucinations that told me to leave home. It was scary. I overcame that and haven’t had them since.
In some ways I was so depressed and angry at the world I would break myself apart just to see if I could put myself back together.
I’ve learned a lot in the 25 years I’ve existed. But I really do want to move to NYC. What should I do…say no?
OH and I was also likely to die at 25 unless I avoided a certain situation. My spirit guides etc told me this. I’m 25.