(Triggering) Shall I fear of acting uncontrollably?

DX'd - Other
1

I fear that I will do a crime. I fear it very very often.
Though it’s possibly my OCD (Harm type) plays a role.
But I overthink of possibility doing something terribly wrong almost everyday.
I fear that I won’t be able to control myself. I fear knives.

My Pdoc with whom I communicate from 2017 says it’s truly only harm OCD. She believes these thoughts are not very reality based and I am very capable of controlling myself.
But one psychologist said once, that probably these thoughts could be reality based. In my country there’s very small amount of good doctors who work with OCD. Doctors still don’t know lots of stuff about the disorder.

:frowning: Idk what to think. I never did a crime but I have this fear

1 Like
2

People with OCD are less likely to act on thoughts like that than people without it.

2 Likes
3

I am still kind of overthinking whether I have OCD.
Maybe these thoughts are reality based? That’s why I feel crazy sometimes. I overthink whether I have OCD or no non-stop

2 Likes
4

Sounds like harm OCD to me. The fact that you have these thoughts but don’t want to have them shows good character.

4 Likes
5

It calmed me down a bit.
Thanks, @Mars
It’s literally like having thoughts which I don’t want to have. These thoughts started with first psychosis… there were moments I was paralysed with fear bc I thought I either did smth very bad or I will do. And why I fear though, it seemed that all my senses wanted that horrible thing to happen. :frowning: so hard to explain… sometimes I fear myself

3 Likes
6

I truely understand your harm fears. I’ve had them myself in the same severe way. They only went totally away for me on Clozapine, Olanzapine and Qutiapine. Personally I find OCD harder to live with than voices. The thoughts are so buzzard and frightening. I have nothing else to say other than that the OCD thoughts are marketed under the catagory TABOO ( something you never tell anyone about).

2 Likes
7

I feel you…
It’s so hard to talk on such topics with others.
It’s a hard disorder to live with. Ofc depends on a severity of OCD.
strangely all mental problems for me in first episode of psychosis. Like all the illnesses started at the same time…

2 Likes
8

The fact that the thoughts upset and disturb you tells me it’s the ocd. If you really were a person who would do that, you would like thinking about it

2 Likes
9

I think you will be ok.

2 Likes
10

thanks for calming me down @LilyoftheValley, I know deeply what you say is true. No murderer would overthink or worry on such things.
actually it’s so hard sometimes to say whether it’s harm OCD or no… confusion I get everytime when I have these violents thoughts is unimaginable.
Also, my pseudoneurotic SZ (newest diagnosis) is very connected to schizotypal personality disorder. Overal pseudoneurotic Schizophrenia, as far as I read about it can mean OCD and mostly having harm OCD or sexual OCD thoughts.

@Storyteller sweet of yout o say…thank you

1 Like
11

I’m glad you know rationally that’s true. And I’m glad you’ve calmed down a bit

1 Like
12

This topic was automatically closed 90 days after the last reply. New replies are no longer allowed.