We are everything but simple. 
Thanks, but Iām glad Iāve experienced much of it ā¦ itās complicated. Iāve been sober for about 2 yrs now and it has helped but also brought up so much out of my psyche that Iām forced to confront.
So much all at onceā¦ignorance would be bliss.
I am grateful that I have a safe place and really not many responsibilities right now. Gives me a chance to read and reflect.
I just really hope to regain some type of productivity soon though.
Iām reading āCelsus: On the True Doctrineā now. Many of you would probably find it interesting.
The works of many early critics of the Christian church were burned by ruling emperors or otherwise destroyed in the second and third centuries, but the writings of the Greek pagan philosopher, Celsus, have survived indirectly through his eloquent opponent Origen of Alexandria. In his apologetical treatise, Contra Celsum, Origen argues against the ideas set forth by Celsus and quotes from Celsusā The True Doctrine at length. Through this treatise, Celsus has come to represent the detached pagan voice of the ages. In this translation, Professor Hoffmann has, for the first time, painstakingly reconstructed the main order of the philosopherās argument. Celsusā discourse shows him to be an eclectic philosopherāa dabbler in various schools of thought, including Platonism and Stoicism, and a student of the history and religious customs of many nations. Hoffman supplements this definitive translation with an informative introduction, summarizing Celsusā premises and placing the identity of Celsus in its historical context.
I donāt ever remember thinking I was Jesusā¦ but I have long fought off the feeling that Iām here to heal people.
Itās sneaky brained thinkingā¦ and I donāt have the ability to just heal the sorrow in peopleā¦ I donāt hold the answers to other peopleās lives.
Itās taken me long time to finally realizeā¦ itās all part of the head circus that Iāve been fighting off.
Looks interesting. The more āyouā look the more there is - there is a vast amount of material out there. i have been collecting & reading more books over the past 10 years, & have amassed over 600 books, mainly on various areas of spirituality & psychology - have also done thousands of hours of research on the internet. There are over a thousand books on the Amazon wish list. It does shift perspectives & understandings.
Your point is wishful thinking, your not the clone of Jesus. You brought up on christian beliefs. However you were too smart to stabilize into what we call the great majority of people who actually believe in the mythological resurrection. See itās brainwashing. Here in the west ISIS philosophy spreads unto the common folk who do not understand the value of what it means to stand what America stands for, what brought us here, and was written the United States Constitution. Freedom of religion was made so that a person can think as they please without being burnt to the stake. Have a very pleasant afternoon.
I think some of it may have to do with our longing to get back with our childhood innocence and times of peace possibly. I can almost explain it all to myself EXCEPT the freaky supernatural stuffā¦like, Iām starting to come to peace with the ideas/delusions of reference; I know the triggers and logic sets in, I avoid them. Anxiety is anxiety; Iām learning solid meditation techniques. The depression and ptsd are taking time. I can be very confrontational but I understand that I can and catch myself. The depression really sucks but at least Iām feeling something now.
It is the damn synchronicity, ātelepathyā, seeing the same numbers and generally feeling haunted that I canāt shake.
Iām not on meds and have no choice but to find alternate methods of coping. Just knowing Iām not alone and reading posts here help.
Iāve been disturbed for sometime now and finally my parents said,ācome home!ā
They no longer think Iām possessedā¦I hope.
My poor kid. I try to explain things but I wonāt give her more than I think she can handleā¦
Idk what to make of it all other than we have experienced things that others would spend fortunes on.
Why? It has to have some significance.
Iām always looking for something so feel free to send me a link anytime.
Not saying itās the same in every case - i think itās primarily a psychological/spiritual crisis. A problem with the egoic mind identifying & trying to make sense of it all, when it canāt, & needs to get out of the way.
That said, i wouldnāt separate that from physiological/biologic & social/environmental aspects to it all.
Some people i think are greatly helped by medication.
Yeah, itās been a bumpy road for sure. I know itās obvious that Iām green to all of this. Iām just glad Iām able to get honest feedback and start to dig into the issues. Thanks.
Itās so individual. Some people chose to see it all as a problem with the brain, an illness, & the best thing is accept that & take medication/the treatment on offer.
Some people iāve come across go with the social recovery/traumagenic models. Other with psychogenic &/or spiritual crisis perspectives.
As far as i can find an answer i take an integral/holistic view - biological, psychological, social & spiritual - that weāre mind, body, soul & spirit within environment, & that things cross all those areas - that everything is interrelated & interdependent - i try & take as whole person a view as possible.
But even then i do accept that itās a condition/illness. i think itās highly debatable (& controversial) as to what āitā all exactly is & what the best ways are of helping people - But the truth is āweā donāt exactly know. My scouring of the information thatās out there has raised more questions than answers, & with my own personal journey iāve not found a categorical answer to it all.
iāve been looking into the Tidal recovery model today - Tidal Model - Wikipedia
A large aspect of things is i think dependent on what understanding, help & support people receive. Maybe some people are harder to understand than others? Certainly extreme states of mind often generate a lot of fear & ignorance within a lot of people.
If our general society/culture was a lot more accepting & understanding of all these experiences & far more willing to assist people in kind & caring ways, then i feel that everything would be so much better for the people that go through it all. But this World is the way it is, & people are how they are - the system is the way it is. Itās hard to know how to change it all?
The thing about synchronicity is the more you pay attention to it the more you notice it happens. The less you pay attention the less it happens
Stick with the sobriety a day at a time & it will get better. My first 3 years of sobriety were Hell.
What psychiatry primarily describes is symptoms/phenomenon - That doesnāt explain the aetiology - what the actual condition is? But the fact is that no one knows. Itās all theory & conjecture, albeit some of it very interesting.
The loss of contact with consensual ārealityā is an interesting one.
In my experience it makes sense to see it as non-ordinary & extreme states of mind/being. Which raises the whole question as to if that is illness in a strictly medical sense? All the conjecture/theory then stems from what meaning/sense/judgements people place on those states of being & experiences/behaviour, trying to explain what causes those experiences, & the debate about what they are & best ways of treating it all, currently dominated by biomedical psychiatric/materialist views of mind/emotions is brain; lock up, label & drug.
None of that is to say that some people arenāt highly distressed/disturbed & unwell - Itās dealing with very complex areas - The whole question of the brain & consciousness, & the whole social/medical milieu we find ourselves in.
Iāve only thought this one time for a few seconds over the fifteen years iāve had this going on.
I thought āim jesusā all of a sudden in my mind. A few seconds after someone in my mind says āsee? thats how we do that to people.ā
This thought sounded and felt just like me, but it wasnāt me thinking this. Hey it happens.
Thats how my thoughts are also
Thatās what happened to me, exactly. It was silly
What if you werenāt jesus, but was actually the anti-christ?
Pansdisease is correct. You were all mind controlled to think you were Jesus. Wake up. These are the abcās when it comes to the situation: it is called telepathy, thought insertion, and mind control, and they are not human.
No need to wake up daimon.
Why wake up? Just to stew on it? No way out and no way to stop it.
Youāll just sit there and know it the rest of your days.
Your brain works like an electrochemical computer, and they are hacking it. These are the fundamentals.