im not sure what to do everything feels messed up in my head and in my heart. my life is llke a depressing and slightly scary black and white movie i have no motivation to live. i see no purpose in life. ?
1 Like
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”
Right?!
I don’t know what to say, really. My head is jumbled up right now. Waiting for a moment of calm whenever it finally comes.
3 Likes
“Arrr, it’s driving me nuts!” said the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants.
1 Like
please tell someone you are so down. Please don’t hurt yourself. Life will get better. tell your pdoc, tell your family anyone…please don’t give up.
1 Like
You invent your own purpose. Whether its exercising, volunteering , dedicating yourself to be a good person, helping others etc. Who says you have to have a purpose anyways? No one ever told me I had to pick a purpose. I don’t need one, I’m fine without one. I think about my purpose in life is about once every two years. After spending ten minutes thinking about it, I put on my shoes, I go to McDonald’s for a Big Mac, drive home and watch TV and talk to someone and go to bed early to rest up for work and I forget about it.
i dont know theres something wrong with my brain i am half way one person half way the other. theyre both me one is me the other is the demon and they both interact in my thoughts it took e a while to realize this, thinking is like that horrible torture method where they pull all their limbs off. that is how my head feels. i am really thinking badly. i dont know what to do im just doing drugs and drinking to null it but its stopping working
I feel you i know it’s hard right now but you gotta always look at the bright side everything gets better with time just gotta let it be for the moment drinking and drugs is not gona help trust me your just putting your self in a bigger hole stay positive have faith in yourself you got this stay up
1 Like
I know firsthand how you feel; it’s tough.
The only thing that is getting me through, right now is meditation, prayer, lots of sleep and taking care of myself.
Take it easy. Relax, read some good, uplifting books. If I am too depressed to read, I sometimes watch a good movie (Some feel-good shows I like: The Secret Garden, Edward Scissorhands, Amélie, Friends, Coraline).
Most days I have to stay in bed till noon, or even 3pm. It’s hard, and I often end up breaking down and/or crying for a long time, if I attempt any productive activity. One that keeps me going, is to just remember that everything is temporary, even pain. So if I hold on, one day soon it will be gone. It’s a law of the universe.
I have a tattoo down my forearm that says, “Soon these burning miseries will be extinct.” My reminder that pain won’t last. I also have Psalms 34:17-22 o my wrist: “The righteous cry out and the Lord hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves such as have a contrite spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers them out of the all. He guards all his bones, not one of them is broken. Evil shall slay the wicked, and those who hate the righteous shall be condemned. The Lord redeems the soul of his servants, and non of those who trust in him shall be condemned.” My reminder that God does not let me suffer, I have to trust in him.
You will get throught this, I promise!
1 Like
thanks guys 
its been a really hard week ive been crying a lot. about everything feeling like everything is fleeting and i wont always be sad so if like my baseline is alreaydy bad everything will affect me. andi lose my inhibition
I’m truly sorry you are feeling that way. It really tough! Are you on any anti depressants? The usually help especially if you find the right one for you. This illness is horrible and I wouldn’t wish it on any one. With the right drugs it does get better. I hope you feel better soon. Good luck
things are still pretty bad but Im pretty sure im going to start clozapine next months. im also having so many suicidal thoughts and confusion
Things are getting pretty bad for me too, I honestly don’t know if I’ll make it out of this. I hope you feel better eventually, being treatment resistant is just terrible. I’m treatment resistant so I have to choose between very high meds and being a zombie or moderate meds and being crazy and suicidal all the time. There doesn’t seem to be any in between.
i relate completely. NOTHING WORKS
1 Like