I remember a long time ago, a classmate of mine told us what he discovered about reading about death omens. He said when you start reading, you begin to see those omens everywhere and more often. So he advised us not to read about them.
Maybe its explained bc the brain seeks confirmation and quickly filters through randomness to see those patterns? Forgetting that there Are Real coincidences that you ignore as glitches in the universe? Fading into background consciousness…given as normal occurrence.
Maybe in worse cases, schizos start projecting their confirmation bias on to the world? Thats why they see patterns? Anxiety might narrow the interpretive focus?
I have delusions on this topic. I thought in my most psychotic states that the world was a pattern itself. But I also said coincidences are more inevitable as the world becomes more complex. I also said the sz mind is very complex so it notices the coincidences more. I also said coincidences are proof of god regardless of my complexity theory. So the more complex the universe becomes, the more god will show itself. This on smaller or bigger scales. It doesn’t matter. The chaos rules continue to apply no matter the size of the system. Whether it be your own sz mind. Or this sz world. As it becomes more complex, coincidences are more inevitable. So is god to show itself. This may be all delusions or some delusions. But this is what i thought while psychotic.
As for me, i dont think synchronicities are from god. They seem more like curses and a cosmic joke… preventing me from not being paranoid because they glitch at the times i struggle not to be paranoid. So i wonder, why is the universe making me stuck in this limbo, preventing me from seeing more randomness?
In the end, though, there is no one to blame but myself and my perceptions. Kinda sucks.
Not sure about this but I think suspicion and paranoia are different things, if you are suspicious about something you will end up finding the patterns for confirmation whilst paranoia would be more like making stuff up (?)
When im psychotic I believe in simulation theory and so I think the world is like a mathematical equation and made by a computer. I do not blame myself for my faulty thinking. I believe in the responsibility to be the best you can going forward. But you were always doing the best you knew at that moment in the past. I think meditating can help me. Not sure about everyone of us. I have a very “whole” mind right now. In the past I had “holes” in my mind. So now its add a w in front. I may have delusions but my mind doesnt feel broken anymore. So I can probably meditate. Well in the car today I just listened to the sound of the engine and tried not to think and it helped me tonight. I really need to get the noise out of my head.
Youre lucky to be where you are. You dont wanna believe some of the stuff I believe.
Lol. There are perks to being really crazy along with intelligent but id trade that any day for being a bit more normal.
I guess blame isnt the right word. Maybe being more accountable and not shift origins of causality to an external force? I guess if i make myself more aware that the cause of my distress is not the fixed belief that something external carries it but rather my perceptions, i have more power to lessen the feeling of distress. I hear that meditation does help lessen psychosis. A few schizo friends tried it. What you did seems good integrating pieces of yourself to be more whole.