And then there’s the egoism question. I think ego is necessary in order to find how I can benefit others. Ego is indispensable for finding your soul. Without soul, our lives are forfeit. I saw my mother miss her calling and waste her life. Nobody understood or even knew her but me. She needed to be an artist. My brother still demonizes her memory, but I do not. Mom was too brilliant for her company. She smoked her cigarettes and watched soaps like a homemaker, but her marriage to my dad was a dead end. I watched her life force fizzle away over the next 30 years. She was some fantastic begonia that never got to bloom. She was an instance of contradiction in nature’s scheme. Mom was supposed to blossom into something great, but her chauvinistic generation blocked her… Hence why I say trust to nature and don’t betray your own soul. Putting others first puts the cart before the horse. Self-love is paramount in getting the momentum going. We cannot love others if we don’t first love ourselves. All flowers need water and sunshine, as people need validation for their gifts. When a plant is blocked from sunlight, it will stretch and distort itself around obstacles to find it. Same with people. Some of us are ugly ducklings who need to find our swan identity. Once this is actualized, THEN we can shower our good words and deeds on the world around us. This enrichment to the human world is like a supernova explosion’s enrichment to the universe. My mother never got to do this, but I’m hoping I will.
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I like the ugly duckling reference. I’m trying to become a swan now.
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