The Ideal way of Life

I have just been thinking on the way to live our lives.

Most of us tell us that the best and the ideal way to live a life is to start a Family – Meaning Marry, have Kids and work for that - a Job, a Car and a House.

And then grow old in the family and pass away.

Just wanted to understand if this way of life would give happiness to anyone. Or rather the question to be asked is that whether this type of life is bound to succeed in giving happiness in the first place?.

More importantly the question to be asked is if whether having this life helps the entire humanity as a whole?.

Lets say everyone decides to do the same - All start a family and then be within themselves. Sure you could have a few friends while being in the family but what is the overall benefit to others you are pursuing?.

For me I would say that this type of life would not lead to happiness , definitely not happiness in the long run. As I suspect, many old men or women eventually discover at the ■■■ end of their lives.

For me happiness is more about living a life making a difference to others. Now this difference could in diferent things - you could fight a war in the jungles and help bring about a revolution to change the entire society for a long time to come - this could give you satisfaction.

Or you could start a charity or join a charity and work full-time feeding children, teaching them, helping the unfortunate folks and bring a difference with full energy and with a lot of passion involved in it.

Or you could actually innovate and start a new technology or a organization with an intention to make money inorder to donate that money for the betterment of humanity.

Wouldn’t humanity benefit a lot if people could start implementing their lives and their philosophical outlook of lives in this particular way?.

And in terms of relationships, it is an accepted fact that noone can ever live alone. We all need that SOMEONE to always be with us - if nothing else then just for that joy of sharing and giving.

So an acceptable relationship pattern could be Friendships and being with a lot of intimate and romantic friendships than getting into a marriage and being with that individual for your entire lives?.

Your thoughts.

Well my ideal life… is pretty simple…

Learn to live cheap and efficiently… spend time appreciating the art and design of things… find the soul mate…

As far as having a family… I’d like to keep the option open… but with the ■■■■ I’ve seen of this world… it’s a huge risk you have to commit to… lucky it works out most of the time… but its ongoing to have little dependent on there.

I barely got to this point in life… If I were to start a family I’d have to know my kids would have a better chance than that.

As long as I have my computer and video games… a good car(s)… and stable diet… money to go out occasionally… that’s all I need from money…

I have a super comfy 2 bedroom apartment to myself for now… but I really only just got stable.


My ideal life…and I want to be realistic here… I think it would be more or less the way it’s inclined to be.

I want to finish my studies and work on the what I’m studying. Maybe open my own practice, probably keep studying some more maybe psychology after this.

Find someone with that special connection, I think we all look forward to that. But I came to terms already with the notion that that might never happen.

Do some more volunteer work, more activism, more exercise. Things I’m putting in second place now and will come a time when I can work on those things again with full enthusiam.

Live by the beach, that’s a dream of mine.

Maybe have kids, maybe have dogs and cats.

Keep in touch and make new friends.

And mainly, not having a relapse when I’m alone and can’t help myself.


When I was a teen ager I looked at family life as a fraud, and I didn’t want any part of it. Now that I have gotten older I feel like I have missed out by not having kids. Whenever my niece and nephews came over I realized how fulfilling having kids can be. I’m not heartbroken, though. It just didn’t work out for me.

I tried the marriage with children route like everybody else because I always heard from a young age that that is what you are supposed to do. So, I married very young and quickly and had a baby. That marriage went sour fast and turned into divorce. I decided unconsciously never to marry again and I stuck to that decision all my life. I only had one child and when the child turned 30, he died. At which point I made the decision to become completely celibate for God. A decision which has made me the happiest that I have been in my entire life. Today my life is focused on music, yoga, prayer, friends, volunteering, exercise, worship, the internet, real estate, composition, reading, archaeology, art history, going out to eat, prayer groups, etc…etc… I enjoy my life today very much. I could not always say that.

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Like crimby, I missed out on having kids and wish I had had some. I had one chance to be a father but the woman didn’t want the baby so here I am at 53 without any children. If I had had children before I got ill I would be a poor example of a father since I don’t work. No shame there. I’m better off just being alone with my girlfriend and dogs.

I just want to remain stable, balanced and sustainable

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